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oh man! it sounds like you're right.. she's still seeing you as a sitter
until that gets resolved, being a guardian would not be a great idea. you're just signing up for 15 years of "this"
both J's BPs saw us this way once upon a time. my only advice - don't let them negotiate. the second she saw "not a good time" , Pumpkin's BP kept pushing until she wore you down, right? its like dealing with a spoiled child. if they know they'll eventually get their way, they will keep going until they drive us nuts.. until they get what they want
the only thing that works in my experience was a show stopped, firm response - "christmas week is inconvenient; we can schedule for the following week". i mean, what's she going to do? get the cw involved? if she does, she risks even less flexibility
i'm so sorry. hang in there