Hi All. I was reading through some of these old threads and found some interesting statements and questions. The question I raise comes first from a statement from my perspective and experience. That is, we adopted a multiracial little boy. We are white. He is now a young adult and seemingly well-adjusted. Through the years we talked openly about adoption with him and with our other children. For the rest of us in our family, adoption was just a fact - not an issue. And I appreciated, at the age of 16, when our son wrote a little article about being adopted and the predominant theme was that adoption for him is a non-issue. He said that it's no different than having been in boy scouts; or having had a broken nose; or participating in a sport. Sure, it is part of who he is, but it's just one part of so many things. He had a hard time understanding why it was such a big deal. And so my question: Is adoption truly a non-issue for some? He seems emotionally healthy enough that I believe it is. I just hear so much from others about buried feelings and such. Your thoughts?
I think it can be a non issue! My son is half hispanic (through his birth father) and as he gets older I was to teach him about his culture and heritage. I think it would be fun to incorporate his heritage into our lives. I grew up in a transracial home with a Japanese father and a White mother. I thought it was really fun because I got to have so many fun experiences learning about Japanese culture and cooking new foods to honor my ancestors. I want to do the same for my son, so that he feels a connection to his family who came before him.
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I think it's all a matter of how it's handled. If it is normalized from birth, and if people around them treat them well, and not like an "other" because they were adopted or because of their race, it can definitely be a non-issue. It definitely has potential to be an issue, especially if they are raised an environment that is hostile toward minorities or adoption. But it doesn't have to be.
It has to be handled the right way. There are some people who believe race should be a non-issue. For people of color, that's not possible. We don't get privilege. I think some of it is also the person's psyche. Some have stronger psyches than others.