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Hi All, So I was adopted aged 5, now 22, and had no contact with my dad or the other one (I know it seems harsh to call her that, but she is a horrible person who doesn't deserve the title of mother). Anyway, about 4 months ago I found my dad on Facebook and sent him a message. We have been chatting casually since, half catching up on the past 17 years, half discussing current events, shared interests etc. With Sunday being Father's Day we have decided to arrange our first Skype call. I'm in the U.K. and he's in the US, so a physical meeting won't happen until at least next year. Anyway, for those who have had contact with birth parents and developed a relationship with them, is there any advice you can give? I'm really anxious about it and whilst I would love to discuss some of my childhood experiences when I lived with him, I don't want to bring up things that might be uncomfortable or painful for him. And topics for discussion would be appreciated, as well as experiences you might have of the first time you had a face to face talk with a parent. Thanks! -Connor
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Hey Connor,I'm so excited for you and your birth dad! I know it's nerve wracking, but I'm sure you will be glad you did it. I'm not an adoptee, but I am a birth mother and if he's anything like me, he will just be thrilled to see you, no matter what you talk about. I think it's okay to talk about your childhood. Sure it might be uncomfortable at first, and you can always tell him if he doesn't want to talk about 8t he doesn't have to. But my guess is that it will be okay. Talk about your life growing up, he will want to know all about it and all about you. Ask him questions about his life. And definitely keep us posted on how it goes!
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