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My little sister was born in 1993. Our adoptive parents were crazy protective of her the first few months of her life. They didn't want her out in public much for fear her biological parents would see her. I know back then there were some public court cases where kids were given back to their birth parents for various legal reasons. Was there a period where you were nervous about losing your adopted child or does that not really happen anymore?
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I'm not sure about not going out in public, but I do k ow of a lot of adoptive parents who have been hesitant to have visits or send photos because they're afraid the birth parent will change their mind and try to contest the adoption. This seems kind of counterproductive to me, if I were promised an open adoption and didn't see that being kept I'd be more likely to contest. And nowadays it's virtually impossible for a birth parent to contest an adoption and win after TPR has been signed.
My little sister was born in 1993. Our adoptive parents were crazy protective of her the first few months of her life. They didn't want her out in public much for fear her biological parents would see her. I know back then there were some public court cases where kids were given back to their birth parents for various legal reasons. Was there a period where you were nervous about losing your adopted child or does that not really happen anymore?
I think that would be more of a fear with a child who had been adopted after a TPR with child services. I think it is more of a fear with stranger adoptions than with someone you know and would possibly keep in touch with anyway, which goes to the heart of that one issue of asking random unwed mother’s if you could adopt her child. If you don’t have a relationship with them you won’t be able to trust them to the same degree as someone with which you have a connection, but if you remember that this woman is making a decision to give her child the best life she can, and if she feels adoption will do that then she will want to know that the child is loved and safe and happy. Those periodic visits or pictures go to reassure that mother she made a loving choice and the right one for her child. There had been in the late 80s & easily 90s (when open adoption was first becoming common) some cases of mother’s changing their minds and not being able to get their children back (some of it due to dishonest agency practices at the time which lead to more protective laws) there were some instances of bio parent abductions, but they were not a really common occurrence