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My husband and I have talked about adopting through foster care for several years. It was actually something we both felt strongly about prior to even meeting each other. I have a son from a previous relationship and he has wanted siblings for years. We had started to look into it more seriously when we got married in 2014, but then we got pregnant and I miscarried so I was not emotionally in a good place. We once again started the process, but I got pregnant in Oct. 2016. Our daughter will be 1 this July a week before our son turns 10. He and I are still interested in adopting a child and my son really wants a brother close in age to himself, but we are also interested in having 1 to 2 more bio kids. Am I crazy for thinking of adopting at this time? Does anyone else think a boy between 6 and 9 would fit well in our family? Should our family see a therapist with our older son first? Has anyone else ever adopted an older child when they already have biokids?
I have not but I've read that a foster child should be the youngest. Foster children go through trauma and that comes when they're placed in a home. A foster child will act out with you, other kids and at school. Not trying to dissuade you but looking at it realistically. Plus a foster child should have a number of medical appointments that you'll have to transport him/her to. Just something to think about.
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My husband and I are just beginning our adoption journey so we don't have a child yet. we plan to adopt an older child around age 10. we have no other children in our house so we cant exactly give you feedback. But I do want to encourage you! The caseworker for each child will know best if that child will thrive with younger and older (or similar age) children. The best thing you can do is "foster to adopt" in this case a child would be placed in your home for 6 months leading up to the adoption. It would give your family a feel for the child and also the child a feel for your family.
I keep going back and forth myself but its just normal pre child anxiety that anyone has wether its through birth or adoption :) Then I remind myself that wanting to adopt an older child is not the norm and for my husband and I to be in agreement means we are on the right path :)
Last update on April 16, 6:43 am by Sachin Gupta.