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Hello,
I am new to the forums. My husband and I are licensed as a therapeutic foster home. We've been licensed almost a year and started off doing a bit of respite before getting out first placement. We got our first placement in end of April of this year and just put in our 30 day notice and I am feeling so insecure about it. He's a 12 year old boy with severe ODD, ADHD, anger issues, depression, and constant school suspensions. We regret starting off with a tween as I think it was too much, too soon. We have no kiddos of our own, I have a background in behavioral stuff but we are young, mid-twenties so the learning curve is huge.
We ultimately decided to disrupt due to escalating behaviors and my husband didn't feel good about leaving me with him eventually. He has kicked me in the stomach a few times and hit me in the face. At a respite he hurt an animal and shattered an entertainment center with a baseball bat.
Although the animal cruelty did not happen in our home, it is one of our "lines" we don't cross at our house and seeing as we have 2 cats and a dog, we don't want to wait around to find out. When our kiddo is one of his "moods" it lasts ALL day, sometimes 4 days straight with constant name calling, yelling, defiance and sometimes staying outside late and not coming in for bed so then we have to stay out with him.
I just feel so awful though, especially as our first go around. This kiddo has been through so much and loves being with us.
Any experiences with disrupting?
Hello,
I am new to the forums. My husband and I are licensed as a therapeutic foster home. We've been licensed almost a year and started off doing a bit of respite before getting out first placement. We got our first placement in end of April of this year and just put in our 30 day notice and I am feeling so insecure about it. He's a 12 year old boy with severe ODD, ADHD, anger issues, depression, and constant school suspensions. We regret starting off with a tween as I think it was too much, too soon. We have no kiddos of our own, I have a background in behavioral stuff but we are young, mid-twenties so the learning curve is huge.
We ultimately decided to disrupt due to escalating behaviors and my husband didn't feel good about leaving me with him eventually. He has kicked me in the stomach a few times and hit me in the face. At a respite he hurt an animal and shattered an entertainment center with a baseball bat.
Although the animal cruelty did not happen in our home, it is one of our "lines" we don't cross at our house and seeing as we have 2 cats and a dog, we don't want to wait around to find out. When our kiddo is one of his "moods" it lasts ALL day, sometimes 4 days straight with constant name calling, yelling, defiance and sometimes staying outside late and not coming in for bed so then we have to stay out with him.
I just feel so awful though, especially as our first go around. This kiddo has been through so much and loves being with us.
Any experiences with disrupting?
Wow, What a way to start. I am so sorry that you had such a challenge for your first placement. I know it has been some time since you decided to disrupt to disrupt placement. It is a very hard decision to make. My husband and I have been fostering for 6 years and have now adopted 3, but we have had 17 children in our home during that time. Our first placement was not with a tween but a sibling set that was as disruptive as your guy. I learned so much from that experience. I hope that you were able to find support through your challenges. It is worth every minute even if you have to send them onward. We have maintained contact with each of our children and support them through their struggles and trials. I wish you the best.
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Hi,
oh !! it must be a very challenging as a first experience. You have to learn how to discipline a child with ODD. You will change his life. I wish you good luck.
Last update on May 30, 1:57 pm by Nina taylor.
Heya!
Something similar happened with our first placement. At the end of the day, our kiddo just needed a level of care we couldn't provide and the state should have known (we had the crisis team out 3/4 times a day most days). Disruptions are sad but they happen.