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Originally Posted By Stacy K.
The child I gave up for adoption wants to come back home to live with me and her biological father. She was adopted by her cousion. My child has been a part of our lives thru this adoption. I'v had three other kids since she has been adopted. They all get along fine and love each other so well. Where my child lives now she has no other sisters or brothers. She is alone. My daughter and I get along so well, you would think she was never given up. Now, she wants me to fight to get her home, and I want her back as well as the rest of the family. She is 13yrs old. Her adopted mother won't let me see her or my kids, because she told her she want to live with me. My child and I sneak and talk to each other and she is so unhappy. What can I do to help her?
My, what a lightening fast judicial system you have! Are you saying they've been found guilty by a court of law or that it's being investigated?
I would imagine then, that your daughter is in foster care at this time?
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Let's see ...
She was adopted at age 7 ... when you were 19 ... and you had three other children by then, too? :eek:
And you got overnight results on your complaint of "child abuse" against the grandparents -- even though the crime was not so egregious that you felt the need to immediately report it to the police? :confused:
Incredible! And I mean that literally.
WOW! A week and already they are GUILTY of child abuse. Amazing. I've never heard of a CPS case resolving so fast. They must have been pretty darn horrible for the case to be resolved this quickly.
But You Must Not Forget It Was An Open Adoption Till I Divorced There Son!!!!!now They Dont Allow Me To See Her Or Have Any Contact With Her!!!!my Ex Husband Gets To See Her Everyday!!!it Was An Open Adoption How Did Things Go So Wrong???i Got To See Her Up To The Point Were He Got Remarried!!!!now They Wont Let Me See Her At All!!!because His New Wife Doesnt Want Him To Have Anything To Do With Me!!!
No The School Called Dhs Thank God It Took Almost 3 Days For Them To Reply And To Find That The Abuse Was Real!!!!!she Is In So Much Pain I Just Want To Help Her Out Not Hurt Her!!!!she Has Always Been Mature For Her Age !!!but I Cant Help But Belive This Is What She Wants So I Have Got To Move Foward With It!!!
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I Guess Since You Havent Been In My Situation You Dont No What You R Taliking About Yes I Was Young!!!and U Nagg Me For That I Was Stupid At 19 And Let My Ex Husband Talk Me Into Doing Something I Didnt Want To Im Sorry !!!!!i Did The Wrong Thing At The Wrong Time But Dont Hate Me Or Her For That I Was At The Point In My Life I Wold Do Anything For My Husband !!!!! I Didnt No What He Had Planned He Was 27 At The Time !!!!!i Thought He New Everything!!!!i Made A Mistake If U Belive N God U Could Understand If Not Then I Guess You Judged Someone For No Reason!!!!! I Thought I Could Give Her A Better Life And Still Be In Her Life!!!!!!but Thats Were I Messed Up!!!! I Only Wanted The Best For Her!!!!but Thats When Things Went Wrong
Now We (me And Her)are The Ones Paying For It!she Wants To Be With Me And The Same For Me But His (biological)parents Wont Let It Happen But They Will Still Let Her See Him And Make Her Go There When She Doesnt Want To!!!
You Really Need To Stop With The Rude Comments!!!!yea I Got Results Because The School Called Not Me Just Because I Had 3 Kids At 19 Doesnt Mean A Thing !!!!!i Was Married At 18 My 1st Marriage Lasted 10 Years So Dont Judge Me !!!!!!i Am A Loving Mother But I Did At The Time What I Thought My Husband Thought Was Right And I Thought It Was The Best For My Babys!!!!!but After Time Went By I Realized It Was Not!!!!but I Want U To Realize That I Love All 4 Of My Babys The Same Still To This Day!!!money Is No Object Anymore I Will Do What I Have To !!!!!!to See My Baby Girl Is Well And Taken Care Of
No They Found Them Guilty Of Child Abuse And Sent Her To Live With Her Biological Father!!!!she Isnt In Fostercare!!!that Is Were They Sent Her To But The Way I See It Is That Her Daddy(biological Father) Didnt Say Anything After She Told Him What Had Happened To Her Why Is She With Him??????
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I Want You To Call Me Since U Have Such Harsh Words To Say To Me !!!! If U R A Mother U Can Under Stand My Home # Is 870-776-1652 My Cell # Is 870-623-3915 U Wanna Talk Dont Put Me Down Before U No Me!!!!!!! I Will Accept The Call What Ever Time Of Day It Is !!!!!!and That Goes For Anyone Who Doesnt Belive Me!!!! Call Me 24/7 It Doesnt Matter
But I Dont Understand Why Did They Call Her Dad (biolgical Father??)because That Was The Adoptive Parents Son Right??????yea But As Long As Me And He Had A Relationship They Was Fine With It Till I Got Remarried And So Had He?????so Whats Up With That????
Geez...talk about a soup sandwich! I'm totally confused. :confused:
I don't know what state you live in, but in Florida your ex-husband would be forbidden from having any contact with any minor children due to the fact that he got you pregnant at either 11 or 12 years old! Yikes!!! He would be considered a sex-offender here...as well as a child abuser. :cop:
Perhaps the State didn't have time to do a background check on him before placing your daughter...3 days is a heck of a quick turn-around. Still, I would assume his new wife is at least over 18...surely they would have had time to catch that!
Good luck to you in figuring out the right steps to take from here. This is one of the weirdest situations I have read yet in my 4 years on the forum. I admire you greatly for finding the inner strength to parent when most other girls your age are just battling the onset of puberty.
~Deb
mom2behappy
Being a supervising social worker myself i can tell you that no judge is going to return a child to a birth parent after a legal adoption. I also have personal experiance My cousin was 15 when my aunt put her daughter up for adoption and slthough my cousin was a minor at the time my cousin daughter is now 17. her mother has been fighting for her since she was 6yrs old and when my cousin daughter turned 15 she found out and wanted to go live with her mom and the adoptive parents agreed and the judge still would not agree to give custody back to the birth mom. what he said was that when the child turned 18 she could choose where she wanted to live. and that if the adoptive parents agreed to allow her to live with my cousin before that time that was their choice but there would be no legal standing for it and that my cousin would not be able to bring the aparents to court for child support or anything. also that the adoptive parents would still be legally responsible for making any decisions pertaiing to the child
My first child I was in a very abusive relationship and lived a unhealthy lifestyle. To make my long story short I lost my parental rights because I didn't get stuff done fast enough! I was mentally and emotionally not stable, I was so lost and confused at the time. My sister has had custody since the whole thing started and I have always been mom to my son and be very involved. since all this has began I have changed my life and became a better person! Im very stable at home and now my sister is not. It would be in my son's best interest to come home. She and I both agree that it is time for my son to come home. And have looked into mediation.
I also have a 17m old that adores his big brother as well and this is where he wants and should be!
i was told by a social worker that the only way around this is thru 3rd party adoption to adopt my son back.
So are you saying that If i was to take this in front of a judge to sign off he will deny me?
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Well.. this is my first time on this site and im more looking for some answers to this question with different circumstances.. i had my daughter when i was 17 and she was put up for adoption.My life at that time was in shambles.... and i thought i was doing the right thing for her.... i was a foster vhild permanent ward and i didnt want that for her.. so instead of fighting our ministry... i gave in to their threats and agreed with great reluctance and alot f pain to do what was right... or so i thought.well that was in 199... we were supposed to have an open adoption where i could see her once a year and get letters ect... that stopped very soon after the adoption was final... i was heart broken but i had no choice... they moved and changed all their info.... well i never stopped looking for her... and i prayed alot... well in april 2015 she found me and we reconnected .... her Amom messaged me and said that my daughter wasnt rejecting me but wasnt ready to see me yet... i was 100% respectful of her wishes... well a day later i got a message from my daughter... and she had no idea why her Amom said that and that that wasnt true.. well we started our relationship that day... and a couple days later i found out that she didnt even live with the Aparents... and that she hasnt for 3 years....obviously i was heartbroken to find out that my biggest fears came true... she has been in group home after group home and does not want the Aparents(who by the way she calls them by their first name not mom and dad) to have anything to do with her anymore.. and she has asked to come home here with me, she wants to get out of fostercare.. im ready to do it but what steps need to happen to make this legal and binding.. who do i call... i love my daughter with everything in me and i want her home here with my husband and i and our other 2 children(5-7).. and not in fostercare anymore.... and advice or help would be appreciated...thank you