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I did send the letter to open the records and I was sent back a letter stating that there were agencies in Mo. that would have to do a search and I would be responsable for the cost of the agency finding my parents. The letter also states that if the parents do not agree then they will not release my birth records to me. I did nothing else after that. That was three years ago. I thought after my adopted parents and myself sent the letters to the agency then I would get my birth info. But that was not the case. If you can help me start this over I would truely appreciate it. I really have no clue what to do.
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I know there is a form that has to be filled out. Were you adopted through an adoption agency or through the state? In any case, the form requires the typical info that most of those do, then if you were born prior to August 1981 then your adoptive parents have to sign off giving permission. Then you mail that form back to the state--you can look up the specifics on the state web site--just go to a search engine and type in Missouri Adoption Records, it should give you phone numbers and addresses...what they do when they get it back is try to match it up to your b-mom, if she is registered. If she isn't registered then I don't think they do anything--there has to be mutual registration. MISSOURI SUCKS when it comes to adoption laws.
Have you gotten your non-id info? Sometimes that can be very helpful for doing a search on your own.
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I conducted a search in 2003. In my case I first contacted CC as my adoption was managed through that agency. They sent me some forms which I had to fill out. As my parents are deceased, I had to provide copies of the death certificates. Following that there was a charge for the release of what is called NON IDENTIFYING INFORMATION and if I wanted the court to assign a CI to search there was an additional fee. I don't know what the fees are today.
The hitch is if the birthmother agrees to release of information and the birthfather agrees then info is released. If one or the other denies release of information then no information is released on either one of them. If the birthmother is located and agrees to the release of information and the birth father cannot be located or found then the court may in some cases release information. Missouri is a tough state to deal with. In my case the birthmother was located and would not even reply to the CI to tell her she wanted no contact. After all efforts were exhausted, the court ordered my search closed. That did not stop me..I hired a PI which was very expensive so I do have information. I also did speak to my birthmother but she wants no contact nor do her sisters.
When you decide to push on with your search be prepared for any reaction. Think clearly about what you are doing and why and just be prepared for the worst. In most cases I think things turn out well but there is the odd case like mine which can be a real blow at the end. I am not sorry I did the search. At least I have names and some hint to my heritage. good luck