I found out I was pregnant about three hours after I had broken up with my boyfriend. By the time I had gotten home and realized something was off, I knew in my heart that I was pregnant. I was panicking, but I knew the path I wanted to go immediately. Being a Gladney adoptee myself, I knew I had only two choices: adoption or parenting.
I told the father by sending a picture of the positive pregnancy test to his phone and told him to come over so I can tell him how things were going to happen. I already knew the path I was going to choose. He was in no way shape or form ready to take on a responsibility like this and neither was I. I had no financial stability, no house of my own, my parents paid for everything, and I wasn’t about to ask them to raise my child for me. He had no job, no motivation, no nothing, and he wanted to raise our child. I came home for a week before I actually decided to tell my mom. I was so scared of how she would react. She reacted with love and sadness. I was afraid she would yell and scream, yet she walked in and said “I know” before I could even get it out. She held me, and we both cried. I told her my plan, and she supported me. We waited a few days to tell my father and brother. I thought my dad was extremely angry with me and begged him to say something. He responded with “Baby, I don’t hate you, I love you so much.” He wasn’t angry with me, just sad because of what I would go through. He also supported my decision for adoption.
I moved into Gladney January 3rd, 2014. I was about 4 months along and had no idea what to expect with my pregnancy. Being from an adopted family myself, no one knew anything about what my body was going through. The dorm was my best choice for support and knowledge. I would have loved to stay home, but the dorm provided the information and support I needed through that time. It was a long five months, but I wouldn’t have done anything differently. Any time I had a question or a new symptom, the staff was always there to explain what was going on and to calm me down.
I started looking through the adoptive parent profiles and found a match in the first profile I looked at. After I had told my caseworker, I had my phone call two days later. By the end of the call, we all were crying, and I told them they were going to have a little boy. When we had our face to face, I was so nervous but excited at the same time. When they got there, Melissa practically ran up and hugged me. All of my fears and anxiety melted away as we talked. Throughout the rest of my pregnancy and afterward, we emailed and talked as much as possible. They have been a gift from God, and I couldn’t have asked for anyone better to raise my son.
Throughout this whole process, each step I took to get closer to the finish line, the less apprehensive I was about my decision. With the support system at The Gladney Center for Adoption, I knew that everything would work out for the better. Now that I have placed my son with his parents and moved back home, there are a lot of emotions that I am still dealing with. The fact that Gladney has a support group for birth mothers and resources makes a difference in my healing process. If I didn’t have that, I don’t think I would be as okay right now as I am.
The fact that Gladney has a support group for birth mothers and resources makes a difference in my healing process.
Adoption is such a beautiful thing. I myself am a product of an adoption and now have placed a child for adoption. I know the joy adoption brings to a family, and I am so thankful for being able to be a part of that joy. Being able to give my son a mom and a dad who will love him unconditionally and provide him with everything he wants is more than I could have ever asked for. I couldn’t give him a life that I wanted for him, but I was able to place him with parents who could. It was the hardest decision I could have ever made, but I thank God every day for the opportunity of adoption. Not only for myself, but also for my son.
Sallie
