“Star Wars” Couple Opens Up About Adoption: She’s a Birth Mom, He’s Adopting

“The first few months as a birth mother are the hardest,” Julianne shares. And to adoptive parents she adds, “Don’t shut birth mothers out. I know some want to. Some are threatened and want that precious baby all to themselves. But try to remember that the baby’s birth parents gave you a priceless gift. Thank the birth mother, love her, build trust with her. Teach your child where he/she came from so there’s never a scary moment about adoption. Allow your child access to his/her birth mother so there’s never a time when they have to search.”

And to women who find themselves in an unplanned pregnancy, Julianne offers these words: “I feel you. I know. I know everything you’re going through and I feel your pain. Most women are torn between terminating their baby or parenting. That’s a huge black and white. What about the gray area? You can do what’s best for your baby, bless a deserving family, and show your love to your baby by giving him a life. Because you didn’t abort and you placed your child, you have given him his best chance in life. It’s the best of both worlds, really. Sure, you have to sacrifice your body for 9 months. But that’s it! Once you see that sweet face and see the happiness in his family’s faces, it will all be worth it. You can hold me to that.”

To all in the adoption world, Julianne says: “Closed adoptions are the old-fashioned way of doing things. This new wave of open, in-touch adoption is the best thing for everyone. I’m excited to be a part of it. I hope to be able to help normalize this type of adoption and facilitate many open adoption relationships like mine in the future.”

But how did Victor feel about Julianne being a birth mother? “When she told me about her previous pregnancy and birth, I was confused because I didn’t know all the details. But it was a great learning experience. I understand tremendously now the great blessing adoption is for the birth mum and for the adoptive family. It’s been a gradual learning process, but I understand more now that God chose Jules to deliver that beautiful baby boy to Earth for the family that adopted him. It’s really beautiful.”

Not only had Julianne placed a baby for adoption, but she was also parenting a very young child when the couple met each other. Vic tells us, “I knew right away that Jules had Addie. I love children and I’ve dated single mums before, so I wasn’t deterred and I definitely didn’t judge.” It didn’t take long for Addie to steal Victor’s heart!

Now Julianne is experiencing another angle of the adoption triad. First a birth mother, and now working tirelessly to secure Addie’s adoption to Victor. “Being on both ends is eye-opening for me. I thought just the birth mothers had it hard. But it’s nerve-wracking for the adoptive parents as well. Adoption is scary. That’s just how it is. It’s scary like a pool that you don’t know how deep or cold it is. But you have to take that leap of faith and then you find that it’s nice and warm and shallow enough to kick back and enjoy!”

With the engaged couple anticipating their upcoming marriage as well as a finalized adoption, Victor is getting an instant family. “I’m super excited about! Really! That’s how I authentically feel. I’ve been slowly prepared for this sort of instant responsibility over the years. I’ve never been opposed to dating single mothers and I think my dating experience prepared me well for my life with Jules and Addie. It feels like a great blessing to know I’m going to be a dad. I’m learning, already, so much about love, patience and responsibility.”

Julianne and Victor fit perfectly together. Not just as The Real Finn & Rey, but as The Real Vic and Jules. “There are too many coincidences to deny that we are meant to be together,” said Julianne. “It’s loud and clear that God led us to each other.” And Victor agrees: “I believe our lives led us towards each other. It was a combination of our own choices as well as guided choices that kept us on the path toward each other. Jules and I fit so well together. But, interestingly, if we had met at any other time in our pasts, it would not have worked. I’m thrilled to be a part of Jules’ and Addie’s lives.”

What’s next for the Star Wars Family? Well, marriage and adoption are priority #1. And they’ll continue to take super-cool Finn, Rey, and BB8 photos. Then . . . DC Comics photo shoots. But that’s not all! They also want to tackle The Hunger Games. So keep your eyes on Victor, Julianne and Addie. They’ll keep making you smile.