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Torn

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For many years I have wondered,
“Where are you and are you okay?”
I thought I’d find comfort in those answers,
When I located my darling one day.

After 19 years, my immediate questions are answered.
As I know where you are and that yes, you’re okay.
But it doesn’t provide the comfort I’d longed for …
Not totally, anyway.

Your Mom is a wonderful woman,
Who has answered my questions and calmed some of my fears,
But your lack of interest in my attempts to connect
Overwhelm me and heighten my tears.

I know that I should be grateful,
As I know more than so many like me.
And while I did what I could to prepare for “the worst”
It was a reunion that was all I could see.

So I wait and I hope and I pray for strength,
From the One who has carried me through to today.
I pray that He helps you too, my dear.
So you know that your fears are okay.

One day, you may feel differently,
And if that day comes, I’ll be here.
I will always love you deeply, my darling.
May that love overshadow my tears.

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