Teen Pregnancy: A Guide to Your Options & Support

Your first step is to take a deep breath. If you know you’re pregnant or are worried you might be, you might feel scared, confused, or overwhelmed. That’s okay. The most important thing for you to remember is that you’re not alone, and there are a variety of resources available to help you. 

This page is yours. It’s your safe space to explore your feelings and understand your choices without pressure or judgment. We’ll run you through what to do first to take care of yourself, your options, how to talk to the people closest to you, your rights, and resources that can help you no matter what you decide to do.

Your Immediate Next Steps: Health and Safety First

There are a few things you can do right away to help ensure that you are safe and healthy. You don’t need to make any big decisions yet. Here’s your checklist for the next day or two.

1. Confirm Your Pregnancy

It’s a good idea to start with having your pregnancy confirmed by a doctor or local health clinic. Even if you’ve taken an at-home pregnancy test, visiting a clinic will let you know how far along your pregnancy is. You can go to your regular doctor or a health center, like a Planned Parenthood clinic. 

The pregnancy test will be a simple urine test, and you should get your results the same day. Most tests can tell if you’re pregnant on the first day after your missed period.

2. See a Doctor or Visit a Clinic

After you know for sure that you’re pregnant, a good next step is to schedule a full visit with a doctor or clinic. Even if you don’t know what you would like to do about your pregnancy, getting medical care is important for your own health. 

When you call your doctor or clinic, you’ll ask for a “prenatal visit.” Prenatal just means before a baby is born, and prenatal care is all the medical care you receive while pregnant. These visits are used to monitor your health and the health and development of the baby. Visits are typically every four to six weeks for the first 32 weeks of your pregnancy, every two to three weeks between week 32 and 37, and then once a week until the baby is born.

3. Find One Trusted Adult

You might not be ready to tell your parents or guardians about your pregnancy just yet, and that’s okay. Still, you don’t need to go through this alone. Think of one trusted adult that you can tell about your pregnancy, someone who can guide you without judgement or pressure. This person might be an aunt, a school counselor, a trusted teacher, or another relative.

Understanding Your Options: You Are in Control

While this time probably feels overwhelming, remember that you are the only person who gets to decide what is best for you and your future. There are three main options that you can consider. 

Option One: Parenting

One option is to choose to become a parent. For many people, parenthood is a rewarding path, even for those who become parents at a young age. That said, parenting is challenging and involves a variety of sacrifices, especially for young parents. It’s important to be aware of all the realities before making the decision to become a parent. 

Here are some points to consider:

• Support Structure: All parents need support, but this is especially true of young parents. There are a few questions you can ask yourself. If you’re still in school, do you have family members who can help you take care of the baby while you’re at school? Will the baby’s father be involved? Are you able to continue living at home with your parents or guardians? 
• Financial Needs: It’s also a good idea to think through your financial situation. Raising a child can be expensive—from diapers and clothes to childcare and food—and certain parts get more expensive as kids get older. There are other costs to think about, too, like a place to live if you need to move out of your parents’ house. If you’re still in school and raising a child, it can be very difficult to also have a job so think about where you might be able to get financial support.
• Your Life and Your Future: Parenthood is a lifelong commitment, and it will impact your life now and into the future. It’s possible to be a young mother, finish school, and build the life you want, but it will be challenging. Take some time to think about what you want for your life. What kind of career do you want? Do you want to continue school? Do you want to be in a relationship with the baby’s father and parent together? 

If you do decide that parenting is the right choice for you, there are resources available to help. If you qualify, the federal government provides assistance for food, housing, and other basic needs. Your school counselor can also connect you with local resources and support groups.

Option Two: Adoption

Another option available to you is to place your child for adoption. Adoption is a big decision, and only you can choose what’s right for you. You may decide that you aren’t ready to parent your child but feel comforted knowing your child would grow up in a loving family. You may have a variety of other reasons for choosing adoption. Any reason is valid.

It’s important to know that in modern adoption, you—the birth mother—are in control. If you decide to pursue adoption, you would work with an adoption agency counselor to create an adoption plan. This plan is meant to guide all decisions you get to make throughout the adoption process, including:

• Choosing the adoptive family
• Deciding how you would like to give birth and what your hospital stay will look like
• Determining what kind of future contact you would like with the adoptive family 

If you do decide that adoption is the right option for you, there are several support groups available to help you during your adoption journey.

Option Three: Abortion

A third option you can consider is abortion. Abortion is a safe medical procedure to end a pregnancy. People choose abortions for a variety of reasons, and you are the only person who can decide if it’s the right option for you. 

There are two types of abortions:

• Medication Abortion: A medication abortion involves taking one medication, mifepristone, that causes a pregnancy to stop growing—and then a second medication, misoprostol, which causes the uterus to empty, similar to a heavy period. Sometimes, only the second pill, misoprostol, is used. You can have a medication abortion from the beginning of pregnancy up to 11 weeks. Some people prefer this option because it allows you to be in the comfort of your home.
• In-Clinic Abortion: There are two main types of abortions that you can receive at a clinic. A suction abortion empties the uterus using gentle suction. It’s an option until about 14 to 16 weeks after your period. A dilation and evacuation (D&E) involves both suction and medical tools. It’s an option if it’s been more than 16 weeks since your period. Some people prefer an in-clinic abortion because they want a medical professional to perform the procedure or because their pregnancy is past 11 weeks.

The decision to have an abortion is your own, but it’s important to note that abortion laws vary by state. It’s a good idea to look up abortion laws in your state and to find a verified provider. You can also call the National Abortion Federation’s National Abortion Hotline for confidential, accurate information about abortion providers.

How to Tell Your Parents and Partner

You may be thinking that the scariest part of being pregnant is telling your parents and partner. It’s okay to feel nervous about these conversations, but thinking them through ahead of time can help you feel more comfortable.

Preparing for the Conversation

Instead of jumping into a conversation, it can be helpful to plan out what you’d like to say. This plan can help you organize your thoughts and make sure that you center your own experience during the discussion. You know your parents and partner well, so you may even be able to anticipate some of their questions. 

Take some time to write notes about what you’d like to say. You can even write down an exact script if that’s helpful so that you feel better prepared and you’ll have something to go back to if you feel nervous. 

You may not have decided yet what you would like to do about your pregnancy, but if you have, be sure to state this clearly so that your loved ones know your plan.

Simple Scripts You Can Use

Sometimes scripts are helpful when starting a difficult conversation. Here are a few ideas for your parents:

• “Mom, Dad, I have something important to tell you. I need your love and support right now. I’m pregnant.”
• “I’m pregnant, and I’m scared. Can we talk?”
• “Mom and Dad, I’m pregnant. I’ve decided to _____. Can you support me?”

If you choose to talk to your partner, here are a few scripts to get you started:

• “I found out I’m pregnant. Can we talk about what to do next?”
• “I’m pregnant, and I’ve decided to _____. Are you willing to support me in this decision?”

What If They React Badly?

Your safety is crucial. If you think your parents and/or partner will react negatively, it’s a good idea to have another trusted adult with you, like a counselor or an aunt. Remember, too, that while their first reaction might involve shock and some anger, your loved ones may calm down once they have some time to process.

If you truly feel unsafe at home, there are resources available to you:

• Reach out to another trusted adult to find a place to stay. 
• The Administration for Children and Families has a list of Maternity Group Homes where you could stay and other resources organized by state.
• If you need to leave your home immediately, call the National Runaway Safeline at 1-800-RUNAWAY for confidential and non-judgemental support.

Your Rights as a Pregnant Teen

Just because you’re a teenager does not mean you don’t have rights. No matter what you decide to do about your pregnancy, you have a right to an education and a right to make your own medical decisions.

Your Right to an Education

Under a law called Title IX, it’s illegal for your school to kick you out for being pregnant. Your school is required to allow you to participate in all your regular classes and activities. Other requirements include:

• Allowing you to leave school for medical appointments
• Providing accommodations you might need, like elevator access
• Letting you make up schoolwork you miss because of appointments and giving birth
• Protecting you from harassment
• Permitting you to return to school after your medical leave

Your Right to Make Your Own Medical Decisions

Your decision about your pregnancy is your own. If you decide to become a parent or to create an adoption plan, your consent is the one that matters. That means that you don’t need your parents’ permission to make these decisions.

The decision to have an abortion is also yours to make, but it becomes more complicated depending on where you live. Some states have abortion restrictions and others require your parents to give consent before you can have an abortion. Check the abortion laws in your state to see if there are any restrictions.

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone: Where to Find Help Now

One of the most vital things for you to remember is that you aren’t alone. There are a variety of resources to help you no matter what you decide.

• For Confidential Options Counseling: 
  • All-Options Talkline for confidential, peer counseling on any pregnancy-related topic
  • National Maternal Mental Health Hotline for confidential support, connection with local resources, and referrals to health care professionals
• To Find a Health Clinic: Link to a resource like Planned Parenthood or local health department sites.
  • Planned Parenthood Health Centers
  • Office of Population Affairs Family Planning Clinic Finder
• For Adoption Information: 

• Contact us at adoption.com
  • For Parenting Support: 
    • State DHS offices have teen pregnancy services
  • For Mental Health: 
• YouthLine
• Teen Line
• NAMI Teen & Young Adult (TYA) HelpLine