7 Ways My Adoption Story Has Helped Me Improve Myself

Did you know that September is Self-improvement Month?

Meghan Xavier September 10, 2015
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I can’t think of any greater route to self-improvement than by going through a challenge like adoption. When I think of anyone participating in an adoption process in any form, I can’t imagine that the experiences would not somehow bring about growth and improvement. My story is no exception. Following are some specific ways adoption has changed my life for the better:

1 – I changed my lifestyle. When I found out that I was pregnant, I decided to adopt a different way of living. I stopped being promiscuous and started to think of others besides myself, especially the little person growing inside me.

2 – I gained confidence and courage. During my pregnancy, I had to trust in my own intuition and move forward confidently with my decision. When people told me that my decision was wrong or stupid, I learned how to not listen to those people and trust in my choices and trust that what I was doing was the right thing for my daughter. After placement, I continued to need that confidence and courage to move forward with my life

3 – I learned how to trust strangers and have faith in people. This happened when I met my child’s adoptive family and decided to entrust them with her. I also had to learn to have faith in our relationship when they canceled visits.

4 – I became an adult. During pregnancy and post-placement, I learned how to make tough adult decisions. I also learned how to take care of myself and my baby. I realized that I had to grow up and stop expecting people to support me when I was fully capable of getting a job and learning how to support myself.

5 – I learned to truly love. When I first heard my daughter’s heartbeat on the sonogram, I loved her immediately. I wanted nothing but the very best for her. I experienced true, unselfish love.

6 – I learned to own my emotions. I cried many times during my pregnancy and post-placement. I was often sad about my decision and later missed my daughter fiercely. But I learned not to be embarrassed to cry. I learned that it was OK to shed some tears, and that mourning my loss was an important part of the healing process.

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Meghan Xavier

Meghan Xavier is a birth mom of two years, and she wants to help other birth moms have an idea of what their journey will be like. Meghan is in the process of figuring out what she wants to do with her life. She is currently in school and hopes to graduate with her Associate's degree by 2017. Meghan is a lover of animals: her true loves are horses and dogs. She hopes to own a horse farm in the future. Some of Meghan's hobbies include golfing, fishing, horseback riding, and reading. Meghan loves the cold and, ironically, loves the beach. Meghan's family is everything to her - nothing is more important.

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