I KNEW Adoption Was The Right Choice For Me

The further I got into the pregnancy, the clearer it became that this boy was not to be raised by me.

Kacey Bailey November 28, 2016
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Facing an unplanned pregnancy humbled me beyond anything other experience in my life. I never had any close encounters with adoption before this, so my journey to adoption seems confusing. The further I got into the pregnancy, however, the clearer it became that this sweet boy was not to be raised by me. 

Let’s start with logic. I was working part time, minimum wage. Barely making enough to feed myself and keep a roof over my heard. Let alone if something happened to my car or if there was a medical problem. I didn’t even have health insurance at this time. Statistically speaking, having a child while living in poverty, the chances of staying in poverty are pretty high.

Being a single mother isn’t ideal, while it’s possible and I know many people who are single parents (and wonderful at being a single parents) I couldn’t help but think this child needed two.

Another point of view, if the birth father decided to accept responsibility and co-parent (marriage was out of the question), my child would live in a broken home. I didn’t know the birth father very well, but I knew enough about him to know that his lifestyle was not compatible with caring for a child. If he played his cards right, I wouldn’t have a choice and would have to allow my child to be raised by him.

Less logical, but just as important, was how I felt about it all. I didn’t have any close connection to adoption before I became a birth mom.

I walked into the agency soon after learning I was pregnant. This agency does more than adoption, they help any single and pregnant women. I walked in looking for help, they helped me find an ObGyn, get health insurance, food in my cupboards, counseling. They helped.

Soon, they recommended I attend a weekly group counseling of other single and pregnant women or women who have previously been single and pregnant. I wasn’t alone, for the first time I felt like people understood what I was feeling. Adoption became more and more obvious choice. So allow me to tell you why it was right for me.

It was right for me because I was broke, barely employed, emotionally unstable, and wanting a better life for my child. I knew it was right choice for me because I found a couple that so desperately wanted a child, and was willing to accept not only my son, but me into their lives. Even now, 8 years later, I’m even more part of their family than I ever have been. It was right for me because I became a mother the moment I found out I was pregnant, and, to me,  a good mother does whatever she can to provide the best life for her children, even if it’s hardest for her.


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Kacey Bailey

Kacey is a birth mom of five years. She placed when she was 21 and has since received her bachelor's degree from Utah Valley University and married her college sweetheart. After years of building her career, she moved into writing and found a love in adoption advocacy. Working from home where she can raise her family is her favorite way to spend her time. Since adoption has created such defining moments in her life, she spends her time advocating its benefits and helping other birth mothers in their journeys.

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