When I was a kid, I loved school. Well, more accurately, I loved the school library—and my teachers’ approval. Back-to-school was my jam. Being away from it for all of the summer break was not my favorite thing.
My children, though, have mixed reviews. A few of them are indifferent about school starting, and a few are dreading it. I wish I could say what exactly makes some of them squeal in joy when they see back-to-school supplies and which ones spend the last week of summer break occupied with mounting dread.
They are all of them good students. All of them have multiple friends and love their teachers. Why, then, does one kid seem like they are going to throw up at the mention of back-to-school shopping?
For the youngest, it is the thought of being separated from her beloved video games. Which, I get it. Texas is too hot to spend much time outside. We watched a lot of movies and played video games all day many days of the week. We’d occasionally take trips to a lake or pool, but I’m not exaggerating when I tell you the water was like bathwater. This is not conducive to a good time outdoors.
I wish I had the ability to be the mom who planned and executed all the fun things all summer. As it was I spent about half my time arguing that if they were bored they could find something to do on their own. To say I’m glad school is back in session is a bit of an understatement.
After a few years of back-to-school seasons under my belt, I’ve managed to find a few things that help mitigate the back-to-school sadness that occurs after the excitement of new clothes and being back with friends wears out.
Scheduling
Use a large wall calendar to plan for activities, holidays, vacations, and birthdays.
This has worked for several years now as a way to get them excited about things in the future. We use a year-at-a-glance calendar my husband gets from work every year. It’s a large poster and it is easy to visualize upcoming events all at once.
This also lessens the “how many days until” question because I just send them to the calendar and ask them to count. Sometimes they do. Sometimes they find they don’t actually want to know if they have to do the mental work.
Routine
It is one of the great burdens of my life to be a person who requires routine to feel safe, calm, and organized while loathing a “boring” routine, my children are much the same. They thrive on knowing when things will happen. The large calendar helps with that, but for everything else we have daily schedules (or at least the framework of daily schedules). I found that if I allotted one hour for something and that something took one hour and five minutes, I would hear anxious complaints. We are learning to go with the flow. Or, we are trying to learn.
Menu Planning
I hate this. I also need to do this or my whole family and life falls apart. Oh, how I wish I was joking.
We used to use a meal delivery service when the kids were smaller and ate (significantly) less food. It got too expensive as they got older, but we still have the beautiful, colorful, easy-to-follow menu cards. Using those, we have the kids pick out a few each, and my husband and I fill in the rest—enough to make two weeks of dinners.
I shop for groceries every other Monday. Using the recipe cards, a grocery list app my husband and I share, and the beauty of online ordering (which I sometimes only use to get a ballpark figure on how much groceries might cost at each store) and buy the appropriate food for breakfasts, lunches, dinners, and snacks for two weeks.
After hauling it all home, organizing it on the shelves, and questioning if perhaps I should instead procure an off-grid cabin and run away with my dogs, I write the menu on a large dry-erase board.
It is a lot of work at the forefront. However, it saves me from having to hear “What’s for dinner?!” 30 times a day. It also alleviates a lot of stress from them. They don’t do well with not knowing what to expect. And while I’d love to just wing it, that doesn’t work for us.
Screen Time
I hate myself for even writing those words. Hate. So much. I am attached to my electronics. Partly because my job relies on it and partly because I’m a millennial, and mostly because if I didn’t have an alert to remind me when it was time to start the next task, I would hyperfixate and have like . . . one very clean window and nothing else. So. yeah.
During the summer we maintain some structure (usually), but even if we don’t, they don’t spend as much time staring at a computer screen all summer as they do when they are in school. So, once school starts back up we have decided it is in everyone’s best interest if they have time after school for homework and no video games/ tablets/computers until Friday after school.
My kids think I’m a monster. If I’m honest my, resolve has nearly given out a few times already. But it’s helping for them to be able to come home and leave school at school.
Therapy
I’ve found that having an outside adult who they enjoy talking to that isn’t a teacher or parent goes a long way towards avoid some of the pitfalls of back to school.
Navigating the back-to-school season with children can be a challenging but manageable task. By establishing routines, planning meals, managing screen time, and encouraging open communication, you can help ease the transition from summer break to the classroom. It’s important to remember that each child’s experience is unique, and what works for one might not work for another. Staying flexible and supportive will help create a smoother adjustment period for everyone. Ultimately, the goal is to foster a positive environment that allows children to thrive both in and out of school.
