In the adoption community, adoptees are celebrated! But not every adoptee feels like celebrating. Some grew up knowing they were adopted, others were shocked when they were told. An advocate for the truth and for healing, Pamela is an adoptee who is now in “recovery.” She shares the importance of honesty—regardless of the emotions it may evoke—from the beginning. Having had to search and research, dig, and work hard, Pamela has only ever wanted the truth. She knows that finding the truth is the impetus to beginning the healing process.
There are other adoptees who have had to find the pieces and put them together. One adoptee faced much adversity, yet she has come out strong. Although life has been hard for her, she feels like her life is better because of adoption.
Another adoptee who discovered her own biological roots as an adult had a blessed childhood. But when she learned what her famous birth mother had endured, it broke her heart. Caroline authored a book, Postcards from Cookie, as a way to advocate for adoption, offer a thank you, support reunification, and to promote open communication and truth. Sound familiar? Although Pamela and Caroline have taken different routes to advocate for truth, they both know that honesty and truth is the seed of good health.
Adoptee Rebecca Tillou is grateful for adoption. Adoption has been a great blessing in her life and she is quick to share the reasons. Equally grateful are transracial adoptees Angie and JaNae. Both of these ladies are women of color who grew up with white parents in predominantly white communities. Reading and watching their stories, it is clear that adoption can be an incredible blessing for the entire family.
Adoption.com writer Tom Andriola is also an adoptee. He shares what it was like letting his family know that he would begin searching for his biological family. Once Tom found his biological family, he began developing relationships. At one point he found himself alone looking at a family photo—a photo he was not a part of. Tom felt abandonment, guilt, loss and more. And yet, he is a happy man.
Many adult adoptees have had to search hard to find their roots. Open adoption has only been accepted and practiced in the past several years. Misty Holbrook searched and found her family. In this article she shares interesting insight into reunification and what she learned through the process. Robyn Cisar also reunited with her birth family. Before finding her birth mother, though, she wrote a list of questions she hoped to have answered. On reuniting day, Robyn was nervous with many questions still playing through her mind. But the moment her birth mother walked in the door, instinct kicked in. With a supportive family standing by to take photos, Robyn’s reunification was joyful.
There are as many stories as there are adoptees. Happy or sad, good experiences or bad, adoptees want the truth. There is something innate in all of us—a need to base our life on a foundation of honesty and true facts. When that happens, life moves forward, and although some of us may need to glance back occasionally, the future is bright enough to propel us onward.
