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My husband and I (we live in Mass) welcomed home two brothers last year. We just celebrated our 1 year anniversary of their coming to live with us and have been anxiously awaiting their adoption finalization. The kids were told everything would be final by June 24. That date has obviously come and gone. The boys ask on a weekly basis when the final adoption will be. They ask repeatedly when at the doctors what name they have to use, since ther're permitted to use our last name as theirs for anything but legal documents. But kids forget, and while taking the MCAS tests here in MA at the end of the school year, one of the boys put our last name as his instead of his "legal" name. He was reprimanded. This whole process of waiting and putting the kids off is ridiculous. Our kids are healthy and we don't have any problems/issues. You would think that an "easy" case like ours would be finalized in no time. I feel like the State of CT is dragging their feet. I have asked our SW if there is anything we can do or say, without hurting the process or bending any noses, but we're told to be patient. I feel we've been more than patient. One of the boys is starting a new school in September. If this isn't final then we're going to have to explain the whole adoption thing AGAIN. Anyone else have similar problems with the State(s) your working with? Do/did you find the Finalization process dis-heartening as we do? Let me know how your handling things. Is there anything legally we can do to speed up the process? :confused: I feel that the more phone calls I make to the SW in CT that the longer this will take.
Tired of the wait :( ,
Liz
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I too was told I would be waiting a year at the most.........Interstate Compact and all, I even have a letter from 1998 stating that finalizing was very near all from SW in Md. I'm still waiting.......7 years later. Don't feel like you are bothering these people, make the phone calls, call the Interstate Compact offices yourself, try to find out where your case stands, ask ????? What you can do to speed up the process, it may help, it may not.
In my case it has not, It took me 2 years to find out Indiana had dropped my case and now no one can tell me the hows or why's.
Now they tell me the process has to be started all over.........This would be the 2nd year they have told me that. I've contacted an attorney and am now waiting to hear from him.
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I have talked with the attorney once and am not so sure he's the right person to handle my case as he is here in Indiana and not sure about Maryland laws.............He's looking into it and is supposed to let me know something by the end of the week, he also made me aware that federal subsidies are available for adoption attornies up to $1500.00 per child, but he also said that the $3000.00 may not cover his fees.......go figure.
AuntMom: I pray that my case doesn't end up like yours. Sorry to be so blunt. :rolleyes: I heard from the social worker this past Friday that the paper work has been handed in and we should be final by the end of September/begin of October. I am keeping my fingers crossed but sadly the kids are saying "yeah right! Thats what they've been saying since June, next month, next month". It's really so sad that (in our case anyways) with easy cases like ours, no real problems/issues, the State of CT is taking their sweet time in making things final. The kids understand that they are ours now and aren't going anywhere but that peice of paper is so very important and its being held up because of bureaucracy and red tape...its all insane!
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I need to vent...please humor me!
Okay its been 2 months since my last posting here. On Aug 23 I talked with the kids social worker at the Annual Case Review. I was told that everything should be completed by the first week in October. Needless to say, we've heard dates before, however we were excited once again! It is now Sept 15 and as of this afternoon the paperwork has been sent in to the Commissioners office. Its been noted that the Commissioner has been known to take up to 3 weeks to review the papers then they are sent back to the Social worker who then in turn sends them to the Courts for the court date (this 2nd part of the process can take up to an additional 2 weeks). SO WE'VE BEEN PUT OFF ONCE MORE!!!!!!!!! I am so tired of telling the kids when they ask. I am at the point now that if they ask when, I am going to just plain change the subject in order to avoid disappointing my innocent children one more time. CT needs to get their heads outta their "you-know-whats" and make the process of being a Forever Family (something they claim they want) alot easier.
I think I have emailed every governor/senator/state representative that I know of. I am sure that won't bring me any resolution but I feel alot better, as if I have actually accomplished something.
Okay, thats it. Thanks for listening :D
Liz