family member of foster care baby

That's hard to say...you would have to contact the social worker....and ask her for visits. She will have to set up visits for your through the judge. If you and your mother are not willing to try and get temporary custody...or foster him..then they may not let you. You can always send him gifts. His situation does not sound very good. She may have a hard time getting him back... depending on how long she will be in jail..and how well she complies with the court orders to get him back. From her history that you have described ..this case may end in termination of parental rights. Are you willing to step aside and let another family...adopt him if that happens? Or will you be wanting to try for custody. If he is in fostercare for a long time..and gets bonded with the foster family...then at the very last minute you pop up and ask for custody...they may not give it to you. They will ask you...where you have been all this time...if you were really interested in him. My advice to you is..if you are capable of taking care of him...and fostering him until your sister either gets him back...or her rights are terminated...that would be the best way to go. Once you are fostering him..your sister will still have to prove that she can take care of him...just as if he were with another foster family. Yes, it will be hard to let him go...once you have become so attacthed...but you will also be happy because you have seen your sister work hard to get him back....she will be grateful to you..and you can learn to put your trust in her as a mother. You will still see him and watch him grow...and be able to keep your eye on your sister to make sure she keeps it up. If you think it would be to strange to raise your sisters kid...especially if he does come up for adoption...and you are now his mother....you will have the problem of setting the boundaries with your sister..that this is now your child not hers...that can be a pretty difficult situation. Back to your question.....If you are interested in having visits with him..then I would definately ask ..and see what is possible. They may be able to setyou up with weekly visits maybe even unsupervised visits.

thanks for your help. I have started reading posts from fc parents, many who do not like visitations from family members. they also seen to resent family members who do not want to take care of these children. i understand both positions. i feel very guilty for not stepping in and taking this baby. (I would however take the 3 year old at anytime since I have really bonded with her and love her like my own-however bf now had visitation and would not allow it due to the fact that my extened family lives in PA and I live in NY. Is this ever allowed? I don't see how since visits with ** and bd very often considering we're 4 hours apart. I personally think it would be best if sister puts the baby up for adoption right from the beginning. there are many people who truly want a baby and this would be best for him. However this is not my decision to make. Also, sister could decide to keep on having baby after baby. What then? Getting back to visitation-my parents (who are in their 70s) really are not able to care for a newborn and the 3 year old too, even though they would love to. They just want the baby to know that they love him, they are educated,easy going, well manered people. Would it really be so terrible for them to see him once in a while?

Hi, if you place your nephew in foster care there is a chance that his mom will not get herself together and he my be adopted by another family. If he is adopted you will probably not be able to visit or send things. I adopted an addicts child. She never got herself together. Placing the baby in foster care probably wont motivate her to change I am sorry to say.

It's not up to the foster parent to decide who gets to see the child..it is up to the court. Sometimes the court allows extended family to see the child...even when they are not looking to get the child.These visits are usually supervised by the foster parent or DHS (depending on the rules in that area). Unsupervised visits are only given to family members who have passed homestudies or criminal record checks. It may be possible for you and your parents to go visit the baby. I didn't mean to imply it won't happen...you never know until you ask. Most foster parents have no problem with family seeing the child....unless the child starts having negative reactions to the visits or after the visits. With such a small baby...there shouldn't be a problem. I know I as a foster & adoptive parent am excited to meet the family..take pictures and get to know the family my kids came from. It probably would be better for her to just put the baby up for adoption right away...rather than put it through so much trama...especially since she will probably be in jail for 6months to a year..then she has to prove herself...she's looking at probably close to 1.5 - 2 years of the child being in fostercare before she can get the child back...by then he will have a strong bond with his foster family...and it will be tramatizing for both the foster family and the baby...when it's time to say good bye. If she truly wants to change her life and get her baby back...i say....DO IT!!! Maybe this will be a changing point in her life..and she will be able to become a good mommy to both her kids and any future kids. As far as future kids...every child is a different case. She may choose to give this baby up for adoption...because of her life and curcumstances...that doesn't mean she has to put up any other children for adoption. Maybe by the time she has her next kid...her life will be more stable. If not...there is always the option to place that child for adoption as well. You have to do what is right for you and your family. If you can't take this child and raise it..don't beat yourself up over it. If youdo get involved...and ask for visits...and say the child does become adoptable..maybe the adoptive family will see your care and concern..and will have already built a relationship with you...and choose to keep in contact with you. We've adopted 3 kids(well, almost 3...our third is almost final). We are going to have an open adoption with our little girls birth family, We just got the number to our sons maternal grandmother and are getting ready to call her and arrange to meet her for the first time and our third was a baby we got at 5 days old..the mom had given her up for adoption and wanted it to be a closed adoption. So even if the baby does go up for adoption...you may still be able to have contact....even if the judge does not allow visists at this time...just make it known...ove and over again to the social worker that you would like the foster/adoptive family to have your number or address...etc.