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Whenever any of my kids come home from sch and say such and such has happened I lose all sense of reality. Fear runs through me like fire. Its totally out of proportion to what the situation is and I have felt at a loss to understand it. Then it hit me, codependency in all of its glory. I have no boundaries and my childrens feelings become my feelings. I prided myself on being fiercely loyal to my childrens welfare. Now I wonder if it hasnt been more about me reliefing myself of unwanted feelings. I just dont know how to separate myself from my children. I thought it was because I was adopted and never wanted my children to feel the uglyness that I felt, but maybe I am still trying to run from it and using my children. Does anyone else out there relate to this?
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I have a good book for you BOUNDARIES with Kids by Dr. Henry Cloud, and Dr. John Townsend. I bought the book because I was experiencing the same things. I still tend to, but it gives you a practical plan to help your children gain control of their lives. I also bought BOUNDARIES for Adults, because it all starts with me.. Hope this helps!
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