Concurrent Planning Experiences

I do not want to sound stupid, but what is concurrent planning?

Hi Jackie. Concurrent planning is when the child is not freed for adoption yet and may still have visits with the parents. I THINK it's when the child has a chance of being adopted out but still also has a chance of going back to the parents, so it's a risk for the hopeful-adoptive parents. I hope I explained that right! It's so good to see someone else who has been married for as many (almost) years as we have and is considering adopting! We've been married 26 years and have 25, 23, 20 1/2 and 19 year old sons and have adopted a daughter through foster care. People think we are NUTS but who cares?! Take care! Kathy

Monica,I was a concurrent (also known as fos-adopt) home several years ago. I was placed with 4 year old twins with LOTS of issues, abuse, you name it. Their original CW (case worker) told me it was a "slam dunk" - that there was NO WAY the kids were going back to bmom. Well, she was somewhat right....During the year I had them, bmom was in jail, treatment for drug/alcohol, a halfway house, the hospital (in no particular order). The county required me to take those poor kids on visits to her - all over the northern part of our state (MN) - it was NOT fun - for any of us. The kids would act out for days. It was awful. Then the first CW quit or transfered (I don't remember) and the 2nd CW decided that bgrandma and bbrothers (b stands for birth, FYI) needed visits, too. I was ok w/bgrandma but NOT with bbrothers as they were quite a bit older than the kids and there was major sexual abuse going on between all of them. But CW #2 promised they'd be supervised and my SW said there was nothing I could do. So this goes on for awhile, until bbrothers start having their own problems at home - they were living with their bdad, not same dad as my kids - so then it was back to just visits with bmom and bgrandma, which then started to often be on the same day/time. (we were commuting 1 hour or more each time, depending on bmoms location)Bgrandma is starting to see how well kids are doing and realizes/understands that TPR is coming soon and seems ok with it - not happy about it, but accepting it somewhat.CW #2 quits/transfers and in comes CW#3. Now up to then, everyone involved w/our case agrees that kids belong NOWHERE NEAR bfamily. We'd been discussing protection orders all along. Many, many bad things happened during this year, lots on visits w/bfamily. So we finally go to court (I'd been going all along) for TPR, I'm thinking, YIPPEEE!!! Then just as judge is re-explaining what's about to happen to bmom, she finally realizes what is about to happen. So she stands up, tells the judge "I don't want my kids to go to HER" (meaning me) and turns around to her mom and asks if she will take the kids, that she will sign her rights over to her (bgrandma) right then and there. I'm confused, am sitting in the back of the courtroom, don't have anyone to ask what's exactly happening as CWs are in the front of the room w/bmom........ everyone is talking, and in what seemed like seconds, the judge banged his gavel.......and gave custody to bgrandma. I was FLOORED. I didn't even know where to begin. I tried to talk to CW#3 but she wouldn't even look at me. County lawyer told me there was nothing I could do. Bmom tells judge she wants immediate transfer, he looks at me, and I told him I left them at home, and it's a 1-1/2 hour trip, and..... at that point the bailiff stepped up to talk to the judge (I'd gotten to know him over the last year of court dates) and arranged for the transfer to happen in a few days' time, over the weekend.I drove home stunned. I hadn't brought anyone with me, not a family member, a friend, my lawyer.....because it was just supposed to be a formality. Three days later bgrandparents picked up the kids in a restaurant parking lot. I never spoke to or saw or heard from them ever again. Bfamily wouldn't allow it. The twins were 5. I told my SW to NEVER ask me to do concurrent planning again. Not when my goal was adoption. I don't recommend it to anyone unless they're long-time foster parents and are used to having to give the kids back. It's cruel. To everyone involved. To those who can do it - more power to them. But at the time, it was considered the "new solution" for families looking to adopt. It shouldn't be. It should be for foster families who are possibly willing to adopt so the number of foster homes a child lives in before being adopted is reduced. My oldest son was in 1 foster home before being adopted. It was a medical home, however, which makes that more typical. My youngest son was in many foster homes - 4 or 5 - and he was 1-1/2. It was never his "fault" for being moved, it just happened that way. Does that answer your question? Sandy

We have had our children for 2 years (sib set of 4!) and just two months ago reached a milestone that was supposed to happen a year and a half ago - termination of reunification services. Our "concurrent plan" was also supposed to be a "slam dunk." No way mom would get her children back, said CW #'s 1 & 2. Our three oldest children (8,7 & 5) have testified in three of the hearings that they DO NOT want reunification, do not want to attend visits and they want to be adopted. Not that this matters to anyone, least of all the judge. He told us (btw we have de facto status) that these children have no say in the matter - so why let them testify and think that they have a say? Childrens attorney, our attorney and county counsel are all on the same page, termnination. So after the termination of reunification services (I thought this was a giant step) we are scheduled to have the TPR in August - oh but if it were only that easy. The judge put in all these stipulations for mom (who by the way was just stopped and had 6 grams of crack in her pocket & a 1 year old in the backseat w/o a carseat, car driven by her husband who is on probation -and they let her go!!!). If she shows up to 6 visits in a row she can get her visits increased. It also states that at the TPR hearing the children will either go up for adoption or go home. Hello! Is that crazy or is it just me?? Why bother with terminating reunification - was that to humor all of us? Oops my bad, I forgot to mention that a week after the crack incident she had her baby (baby #5 - we have #'s 1-4) taken away for 3 days - the judge ordered him returned because if he was in "real danger" they should have removed him sooner. I pray each day that the judge trips, hits his head on a small stone and says "what was I thinking, of course these children should be adopted". We would never go down the concurrent planning path again!!!! ___________ 2 moms 2 4 great kids! M-8, S-7, J-5 & C-2

Monica - I hesitate to write, as youre going to get a really negative opinion of concurrent planning҅ but then again, if youre entering this nightmare from the caseworker / social worker point of view, you should know what itҒs really like for us foster/adopt families! I, too, have lost a concurrent planningӔ placement recently. We (my hubby and I) had been in the program about a year and had gotten several calls for placements, but none ever worked out until AӔ came along. Oh, boy was she perfect for our family! :D She came to us in November of last year, bmom was in jail for a multitude of reasons, bfamily couldnt take ғA because of history and health issues (theirs not hers). Bmom has already lost one child to adoption and this was ԓAԒs second time in foster care. I dont know what factors or criteria they applied to get this little girl into a concurrent planning family (IҒm thinking the placement worker only looked at two things, 1- bmom is in jail with no immediate resolution apparent, and 2 she has already lost one child, repeating history with this one). ֓A was taken originally for neglect Ԗ bmom wanted to go out and have her fun without worrying about her kids you get the picture? Lots of drug, domestic violence and mental health issues abounded. For the first six months, we were told that things looked good for TPR and adoption. All of a sudden, when bmom realized what direction the case was heading in, she got off her butt and decided to get her little girl back. In the mean-time she had given birth to baby #3 and we were told IF he came into care, he would probably come to our home (keeping the siblings together). Bmom starts working her case plan, meeting some of her goals and bam, just like that the judge changes ֓his plan to reunification (never mind that ԓA came back from the first unsupervised visitation with cigarette burns!) even though bmom is homeless, trying to complete a rehab program and is still running around with her abuser!?! At the next hearing, the judge looked at a few letters from rehab counselors, noticed that bmom had gotten an apartment (but no job) alone (for now) so he instructed CPS that ԓA should be reunified with her bmom, but at the workerԒs discretion. ALL of the caseworkers (ours and AӔs) thought she should stay with us. The weekend before the last court hearing, bmom blew off her overnight visitation with ғA, as she was ԓgoing to the lake for the weekend and didnԒt want to mess around with having to take care of the kidsӔ! :eek: In spite of this, regardless of the fact that bmom has been documented seeing her abuser again, in direct conflict with the caseworkers recommendations and disregarding the pleas that if reunification was to happen to let it happen over a period of a few weeks ғto transition and ԓensure bmom has supportive services Ԗ the judge ordered AӔs immediate return home. I found this out at 2:00 in the afternoon and by 7:00 p.m. she was gone. Now I am left with an empty house, an aching heart and a bitter taste in my mouth for the way things were handled. Along with the fear that this time, the abuser will have to pretty near kill bmom before sheҒll seek help, as she knows that if AӔ ends up in care again, the chances of her being adopted go way up. So, everynight I go to bed and pray that my little angel is being fed, that she is safe and not scared and that she is happy to be with her bmom. (God help me, but I pray that she doesnt miss me as much as I miss her!) Now mind you, it has only been a few weeks since this happened, so I may still carry a bit of bias against the system. But in light of all that I have read on this forum, I donҒt think these kinds of stories are the exceptions I think it is more common than the courts and caseworkers would like to admit. At this point, my husband and I are not accepting any more ֓legal risk / concurrent planning placements. In fact, weԒve agreed that if in 6 months, if AӔ hasnt come back into the system, we are going to explore straight adoption Җ will probably stay away from legal risks, unless our feelings change and the case circumstances are different. Thats just a quick prҩcis of our story, but Ill bet youҒll find this is pretty normal and that it happens more often than not, these children end up going back to bad situations. On the other hand God bless you for wanting to help these kids!! Please learn from the stories on this forum and take that knowledge with you into the field. Too many times, the foster parents not only have to worry about the effects of birth parents, they have to ֓wage war against the very departments that are supposed to be helping themԅ

I was just wondering how concurrent planning has gone for us. We are in a concurrent plan for the infant of our adopted sons. They to were concurrent plans. But, after reading some posts on this type of planning, I am more nervous. We had a court date and now we have another in Dec. They are contesting the decision from the juris/dispo hearing. CPS in that county is really great, so I hope it works the way it is supposed to. We have had him since he was nine days old, now he is two months. I just can't imagine him going home and being seperated from his full bio brothers. Just a note--we plan on vacationing for 1/2 of Dec and 1/2 of Jan. I thought the BP would be upset because of no visits. She just wanted to know what we could bring her back.

We too are losing our little girl. She returns after 14 1/2 months today. In December they were talking about fast tracking to termination because b-mom had been on drugs for 13yrs and had 4 kids - 2 of which who lived with different fathers and 1 which rights had been terminated. Now after being "clean" ( we asssume) for 6 months and moving back in with the boyfriend who has her 6 yr old, mom walks on water and will be getting my angel back today. I keep hearing how she is doing really well and hsa now seen the error of her ways- she realizes what's important. These parents it seems know how to play the system- we were told that by the social worker who came last night to investigate the bruise on her cheek she got at her "supervised " visitation last night. The know how much time they have to play and then at the last minute - miraculously see the light. The judges and social workers need to wake up and our nation needs to step up and say - although biological ties are part of a child's history - they are not the be all end all. I believe when you screw up, you pay the price- so your child doesnt have to down the road.

Why was she in care for so long. In Cali, if a child is under one year the parents have 6 months to get their act together. I am just praying that we get to keep our little guy. Even though the SW say don't worry, I know I will worry until the day we sign adoption papers.I am so sorry for your loss. I can not and do not even want to imagine what you are going thru.