Private Adoption

Congratulations on your match! No doubt! And it's only just begun :D A few things to think about as you navigate the process. One thing you asked about was why you can't just secure an attorney for her? For one thing, she needs counseling, not only legal representation, and she needs an independent counselor, one who is helping her consider all her options. If she is not comfortable with the counselor she has spoken with, she has every right to change counselors or agencies. She doesn't have to go with Catholic Charities just because that is who you have started working with. As of now, she is only an expectant parent, not a birthmother, so it's important that you realize and support her in making her decision to place or parent until after the baby is born. You asked when you could take custody of the baby... That will be up to the expectant mother; she has the right to take the baby home if she wishes. But if she supports it, you can generally take the baby home from the hospital. You would then have to stay in-state until the ICPC clears (that is state dependent but can take as little as two days and up to a month). Until the both parents relinquish, the placement is "at risk", which means that you are taking the baby home with the understanding that she or the father can at any time for any reason reclaim the baby and parent. If you feel that this is not a risk you are willing to take, then with the mother's consent, the baby could go into foster care during this time. This really couldn't be further from the truth. It is so much more complicated than this with lots of twists and turns. The agency you are working with should be giving you more information about reading material to help you through the process. Keep reading the many posts here, too, from ALL perspectives. Not only adoptive parents, but birthparents and adoptees, too. Best of luck!

I just wanted to add my two cents here. Plareb is correct on all counts. We are currently waiting for a baby to be born (she was due last week!). We were connected by a common acquaintance so we met before we started working with anyone. DH and I were already on the road to finishing our homestudy with the state when this came up. We started over with an agency, BY CHOICE. We could have hired our own attorney (remember that bparents need to have a separate one) and we could have pushed our own paper, I suppose and found SWs but we didnt want to miss anything so we are going through CFS and an Independent Private Adoption. CFS is handling all the particulars, which is great. It was important for us to make sure the bparents had counselling. The whole process is stressful enough without having to make sure the "t's" are crossed and "i's" are dotted. If i were you, i'd heed the the advice to run home and get a homestudy done as quick as you can! This is something you absolutely have to do for any adoption. It's painless! Best of luck to you!

OK first of all - be sure your attorney is experienced in domestic parental placement adoption. Are they Quad-A? If you're not sure, check the membership roster online at [url]www.adoptionattorneys.com[/url]. You should have an attorney in both your home state and the birth state. I agree with Plareb too that this young lady and the expectant father (if known) should have independent legal counsel. Plareb is right - it is quite complicated and laws vary from state to state. Generally here's how it goes: You complete a homestudy according to the laws of your state Connect with expectant parents making an adoption plan Baby born Biological parents voluntarily terminate their rights according to the laws of the birth state. If biological father is unknown, 'any unknown birthfather' proceedings are followed. Prospective adoptive parents are named temporary guardians, then legal guardians Paparents then petition to ICPC to have the adoption transferred to their home state You then follow the post-placemnet supervision requirements of your home state, petition to finalize the adoption, then are named legal parents. Good adoption attorneys can help you navigate the process in both states. BTW There may be a requirement that a licensed child placing agency be a part of the process. If so, it does NOT restrict you to 'one' agency, both you and this expectant parent have a choice of any licensed agency in the state. Contact the state's Family Services Department for a complete list of licensed child placing agencies. HTH Regina

In WI you are required to be a "foster parent" for 6 months before the adoption is complete. During this 6 months the birthmothers rights will already be terminated so there is not a risk of her being able to take the child back, the only risk of the child being returned to the agency or state foster care system is if for some reason the post placement visit (required by WI law) goes bad, like if baby is abused or neglected. (not saying you'd do that, just saying why they do the post placement and why it's a six month wait)