Agencies that work with single men

and some don't work with singles at all. One here locally only works with people adopting children under 4 years.

I wonder why some agencies don't work with single people. That seems unfair -- I am sure there are many, many single people out there wanting to be parents, female or male.

Rindava, I specifically chose this agency because it was listed as working with single men. My confusion was the tone of the email. Short, not-so-sweet and seeming to imply there was some rule against cross-state adoptions. A little voice in the back of my head is trying to make me think they only said that because single men are hard to get referrals for. I didn't realize that agencies in the US had that much freedom to discriminate. There are a couple of countries that will still work with single men, like Brazil...and Vietnam when it opens back up (hopefully, although this is only based on the past)...Colombia if the boy is over 7. I'm sorry, just frustrated. I've only received two responses to my email of about 10 agencies. The Pos-Neg ratio isn't good so far. I know I said I wouldn't be ready to even start until Summer 06, but I'm trying to already have an agency in mind so I can research it. I was planning to try fostering, but the idea of taking care of a kid, but having the government needing to approve every trip, every medical thing, stuff like that drives me crazy. I'll probably go straight adoption. Thanks for reading my ramble. David

I couldn't find any agency really willing to work with me to adopt my son and then after him I really have not found any....and it stinks. Just because someone is married doesn't make them a better parent. I have seen family after family where only one parent does any of the parenting anyway... I know of a lot of foster and adoptive homes that way as well. I even know of one foster home here where the father has been deployed or stationed elsewhere 80% of the time the last 10 years and they still count that as a 2 parent home. And it does bug me that if I had a husband, even one who didn't help with the kids, I could easily adopt again. One thing though, the homestudy agency has to be licensed in the state you are in and if you adopt out of state, you have ICPC and other things to consider. It can be done, I've adopted out of state and at one point was pretty far along in an Ethiopian adoption with a agency on the other side of the country. If you have a lot of money to spend on this adoption you will be able to get a healthy infant. If not, depending on where you live, you will not be able to adopt except maybe a older teenager with problems, there are exceptions though. Locally the a few Christian, Catholic, and Jewish agencies would not work with me due to my single status....and I could go on... The easiest way to get a placement is public foster care... Depends on what type of child you are trying to adopt. If you are in California it seems you have more of a chance. If you are African American there are some states that are trying really hard to place same race and so your odds will increase. Other then that, I don't know...I know in some states like Iowa single parents have no chance at all.....actually there are quite a few studies that show kids with attachment disorder do better in single parent homes where they don't have 2 parents to pit against each other... So, I meant to say I've been in your shoes....and it isn't fair at all. It isn't right and with the way marriages are today anyway I often don't see the big deal.....I know my daughter's bio brother was placed with a married couple who met in a bar and married 6 days later, they have since been married and divorced to (3 people the woman and 4 people the man) so I sure having what is that 7 step parents was better for the kid then being rasied by a single parent.....I almost at one point lost my girls that had been in my care as foster children for well over 2 years to them just because they were married.... and when you do find a homestudy agency really find out what they feel about single parents before you give them lots of money....

I'm caucasian, with a 1/128th Cherokee...although you can't tell to look at me. One agency I emailed in NC agreed to work with me. Brazil and Vietnam would be my best bets. (Vietnam is only if they open back up, they've always been open to single men...according to what they say.) I want a 4-10 yo, with as few problems as possible. I realize any child of those ages are bound to have problems..even in international adoptions. I refuse to take the teens as I said in earlier firsts. While I don't want a baby...there are still a few firsts I'd like to be a part of. First bicycle, first day of school, first day of junior high, first baseball game (or whatever sport)...stuff like that. Teens have usually gone through those. David

If so, that will bring you some more chances fo adoption from a native American Tribe, especially the tribe you are a member of, even if you don't do any of the native American culture things... Good luck!!!

No, I don't. I'm not even sure what her name was. My maternal grandfather was 1/4 (so, my fraction maybe off..I'm never sure how to figure those things. I know my grandfather's grandmother was an Indian, we think Cherokee..but it could have been Seminole.) Her husband wouldn't allow her contact with any Indians and didn't allow the family to talk about her heritage. He was a weird combo of Southern Primiitive Baptist..slave-owning Farmer-Preacher. We think the maiden name she used was Leaptrot, but even that's not for sure. There's also some on my father's side, but that's even more obscure. I can't prove it, so I've never even tried contacting any tribe. I don't look at all Indian...my parents English-German-Irish predominate. David Edited note: We think it was Leaptrot because there's a vague family legend about her being adopted during the aftermath of the local Indian Wars (an ancestor was a leader of the local Militia).

Some agencies will work with single men to adopt in Guatamala.

I have not run into any problems in my state. Mike keeps telling me to quit taking "all of the kids"! :rolleyes: Whatever!

lol, cool, Indy...I still have the PM with your recommendations. Most of your kids (except for the foster) came to you around eleven or twelve (I know you've said, but I've forgotten again), didn't they? I'm definitely going younger, when I do go. So thats why I'm looking at all options. I'd prefer not to foster at this point. The idea of working toward reunification when I want to raise him sounds too painful for me to do. David

My sons all came "home" at different ages. JA was 16 (22). JO was 15 (18). MA was 14 (17). MI was 10 (16). LU was 14 (16). JA2 was 9 (14). CH was 8 (13). RA was 7 (turned 8 in June). David - I would not throw out the "foster" adoption. Many people think that means that you have to "foster" the child and go through the reunification process. Not true. There are children that in foster care that the TPR has been completed. All of the boys that I have (except RA), were placed with me for adoption through foster care. They had to be in my home for 6 months before I could file for adoption. They were considered "foster-adopt" placements. But I didn't have to deal with reunification efforts, bio parents, fostercare issues, etc. I would check it out in your state. I will tell you this...it helped caseworkers knowing that I have a theraputic foster care license. Those are updated annually. Best of luck to you!