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Originally Posted By Jeffrey OyerI found my birthmother, actually, she found me, and just by luck, of me describing myself, she took a chance, emailed me, we exchanged pictures, and I met her Saturday. Please, any of you searching, listen carefully. My amended birth certificate says I was born on 5/4/70 in Watertown, NY. That is a lie. My true facts are I was born in Rochester NY on 4/21/70. How am I sure, I am identical to my mother, and the same resemblances of my new siblings...hair color, texture, eye color, even gestures. No, NY Registry didn't match us, no Catholic charities didn't. Take a chance....I did, and it paid off. If anyone wants help or info on how my wife made all of this possible, email us at jenniferoyer@yahoo.com Someone 30 years ago falsified my documents, and even though I am reunited, my wife insists on finding out why this was allowed, and if it's still going on. Please, let us know!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
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This is exactly what I fear in my search for half-sister who was born on 5/09/70. The DSS worker lied to the mother by telling her my sister would be with her biological father, but the adoptive parents said no such info was given to them. I strongly suspect that dates were changed so my sister could not find her biological brother. How did you know to pursue it ?
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Wow, that sounds a lot like my life. I was born April 29, 1970, or so my certificate says, in Rochester, NY. I am so frustrated with the search. I just want the chance to know who and where I came from. Isn't it our right to know this information? I have nothing but love and respect for my biological family, sight unseen, as well as my adoptive family. I don't wish to cause anyone heartache, but this is something I live with everyday. Any tips you can offer to help?
My son was born in Albany New York in a home for unwed mothers. At the time he was placed for adoption, I signed a release stating he could contact me when he turned 18. As it turns out, my son had been trying to find me and actually contacted Catholic Charities when he was 16 years old. Nothing was mentioned about the release form even though the document was in the records at the time he contacted the agency. We finally reunited two years ago when he ws 39 years old. There are so many lost years due to the inadequacy and inability of Catholic Charities to inform him of that release document. I will you the best of luck with this agency. They have done no favors for me.
:o That is great that you found all the truth out about your family, I would love the opportunity to find some truth but I am running into brick walls NJ is the most secretive state that I have run accross in an adoptee search. Can you direct me in any way.? How did you get your amended birth cirtificate? I would appreciate any and all help in this matter... again congrats!! :clap:
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Originally Posted By Jeffrey Oyer
I found my birthmother, actually, she found me, and just by luck, of me describing myself, she took a chance, emailed me, we exchanged pictures, and I met her Saturday. Please, any of you searching, listen carefully. My amended birth certificate says I was born on 5/4/70 in Watertown, NY. That is a lie. My true facts are I was born in Rochester NY on 4/21/70. How am I sure, I am identical to my mother, and the same resemblances of my new siblings...hair color, texture, eye color, even gestures. No, NY Registry didn't match us, no Catholic charities didn't. Take a chance....I did, and it paid off. If anyone wants help or info on how my wife made all of this possible, email us at jenniferoyer@yahoo.com Someone 30 years ago falsified my documents, and even though I am reunited, my wife insists on finding out why this was allowed, and if it's still going on. Please, let us know!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
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I would love to know how you found her. I think I have the same problems. On the agency records it states my b-mom's name is susanne, and hospital records say susan. I also know for a fact that the agency straight out lied to my adoptive mom about much info.I would appreciated hearing back from you. holton702@aol.comThank you, Lisa Holton
I was also adopted through CC & don't believe all of it. What posting did you use to be found? my e-mail is sgoofy1@juno.com. Please responf. Have medical reason.
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My adoption was handled by the county social services and after contacting bfamilies (new laws enacted that allows giving out contact info if both parties agree)
found out that the entire story the social worker gave my mother was a lie. She made it out like I was abused and abandoned when in truth I was never abused and was given up but never abandoned.
They said bfather signed rights away when in truth he was never even told I exsisted and never signed a thing.
Because bmom filled out all the info on non-identifying papers she got my bdads all wrong(she guessed)
The social worker who did this in later years became almost famous in our area, there are buildings and services named after her.
I believe that they did this to make the aparents feel as though they were "saving" some poor unfornuate abandoned/abused child....when in reality they are just adopting a child whose biological father probably would have kept , had they been allowed to know and whose biological family was just as good as they are.
Its makes everyone in this process feel like saviors except the adopted child who is possibly made to feel as though they should be grateful.
Hello Everyone,
I am helping my mom locate her daughter. She was born in Syracuse, N.Y. sometime around April 26th, 1970 and adopted through Catholic Charities. Her adopted parents were in the military (Air Force I think) and stationed in Lake Placid, N.Y. I am concerned that my sister may have the same troubles locating us as well. Her birth name was Renee Marie but was later changed to Mary Francis.
Believe it or not, I have a half brother who I met 6 years ago from my father's side (who he never knew about, supposedly died at birth, long story). His birth certificate was completely falsified by catholic charities as well.
Many records are often falsified; common knowledge. I'm happy you found and I understand the similarities between you and your mom, but you cannot rely on those alone. Please get some DNA testing just to be 100% positive.Family resemblance counts in some cases but not in all.My daughter has 7 living natural children. Six of them look like her and her husband; the other resembles my side of the family and is blonde with blue eyes. He looks absolutely nothing like his brothers and sisters; people have asked if he's adopted -- he isn't.Peace,Aunt Pattylovesdonna2@yahoo.com
NJ is a tough State for records. I received my info (unofficially) from a sympathetic Judge. I filed a motion to the Court for my Original Birth Certificate - using a Medical Condition as my reason.
Funny thing was my original birth certificate was not part of the adoption file. The only birth certificate I have shows me being born on 6-26-1956 in Paterson, NJ
The filing date is 7-12-1956 which is the date my bmother signed the relinquishment papers.
The Judge officially recorded that the BC wasn't in the file. He then gave me her Name and Origin and told me to Google her.
FYI - the Surrogate Court Clerk was trying to discourage me from filing - she stated that the Judge wouldn't give me the time of day. Since I had help preparing the motion and the process was only going to cost me $20.00 I filed anyway, I figured what's the worst that could happen - they say no -
I say, don't be discourage in NJ - file the motion - but DON'T say your curious. If you don't have a legitimate issue - try using your need/right to Medical History.
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Congrats on you reconnecting with your family! But gosh, how scary is that? Knowing your info could be wrong? I hope my birthday is right! :O
Catholic Charities has been a royal PITA since I started working with them as well. I'm from VA but it seems pretty universal from what I've heard from the forums. At least you don't have to put up with their shenanigans anymore! :)