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Hello, I haven't been on this board before. I usually am wondering everywhere..... I hope you guys can answer my questions. Ok in the State of Illinois the parent has the right to say whether their child goes to church with you or not. If my home is a Christian home and the parent won't let the child attend church with us what do you suggest we do??? I do know that if the parent don't usually attend any certain denomination and they are saying no the child can't attend, just to be difficult then we can take the child. BUT I am at a lost of what to do if they expect us to take the child to a denomination that maybe we on't agree with...... then what??? Maybe I am sweating the small stuff and losing sleep over nothing.....
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We've have NEVER had an issue with this. If we go they go. What does your organization say? What are you suppose to do with that child if you can't take them with you- do they have someone that comes and watches them. It's your home- you've opened it to better a childs life- your worker should back you and find a way to help you.
Rachele
I have fostered for over eight years in Illinois and so far it hasn't been too much of a problem. In only one case did a parent complain about their child not attending services in the parents' denomination. However, when the cw and GAL checked with the church that the parent claimed they had been consistently attending for five years, no one at the church knew who they were. Issue over. Generally, if the placement worker or cw are aware of the child's practicing denomination, then they will try to place children in either homes of the same denomination or a home that lives near that denomination's location of worship.
Good luck!
Sam
What if you just didn't bring the child to church. There are two teens and two adults in your home right? Maybe you could each take turns staying home with the kiddo. If you only have church once a week you'll be missing once a month each, but better than attending a denomination you aren't comfortable with.
Good luck!
Carrie
carriewoman
What if you just didn't bring the child to church. There are two teens and two adults in your home right? Maybe you could each take turns staying home with the kiddo. If you only have church once a week you'll be missing once a month each, but better than attending a denomination you aren't comfortable with.
Good luck!
Carrie
Hi Carrie, I can see what you are saying but we believe that the bible teaches to "raise a child in the way they should go and when they grow old they won't depart from it" We also believe it is our responsibility to nurture the children as we would our own, true they are not ours but why treat them any different? We only have one teenager at home now, our 19 year old is on her own with her own family in the making. I honestly don't think I will beable to take in a child unless they can attend services with us. A home divided is sure to fall, that is in every aspect of life! Take care sue
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If it were me, one of the preplacement questions I would make sure I asked is "can this child attend my church/ denom"? If its that important to you dont accept a child until everyone understand " This kid will be in the pew of ---- church at 9 am sharp- every Sunday, have a problem with that? Then dont place them with me!" As long as everyone is ok with it up front it really shouldnt be an issue. My guess is 9 out of 10 times no one would be the wiser that this child was taken to your church anyway!
EmmaLeigh2882
If it were me, one of the preplacement questions I would make sure I asked is "can this child attend my church/ denom"? If its that important to you dont accept a child until everyone understand " This kid will be in the pew of ---- church at 9 am sharp- every Sunday, have a problem with that? Then dont place them with me!" As long as everyone is ok with it up front it really shouldnt be an issue. My guess is 9 out of 10 times no one would be the wiser that this child was taken to your church anyway!
so insightful thanks so much!!! I can sometimes get all caught up in the "what ifs" everyone has been a real help with my questions :grouphug: thanks
Hi,
I agree that when taking a child into your home they are as one of your own. We took in three (now adopted), but they were all three foster adopt, so we had the freedom to incorporate all of our beliefs.
I know in this day and age they really are careful with church being in schools and businesses, and also I guess in foster homes when the birth parents have specific wants.
I guess I was just putting out another option before. I definately agree that you should make sure the SW knows you go to church and you would prefer placements who can attend church with you. As part of a family routine, it would be great for the foster children to be able to join in.
Good luck to you!
Carrie
In six years of fostering it has never come up, from the state or the parents. It probaply would only come up in older children.
I would not worry about it. Odds are it will never cause problems. If there was a way to let everyone know before hand it would not be a problem. (How many SW are in your system, and can they remember this.) You are going to deal with so many people.
When any kid gets dropped off, inform the sw of this and tell her to get back to you on it. Then you've done your part.
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I have been fostering in Illinois for over 12 years, this has never been a problem for us. I am even now signing my 3yr fd up for protical school for fall. This is unlike when we started out 12 years ago. Back then we had to get permission to get fs hair cut and to take them across state lines to get groceries. Like the others it is always a good idea to make your concerns and intentions known from the very beginnng. Good luck and God Bless
taci
Mother to 4
20bs
14 fs gaurdianship in 2004
13 fs adopted 2000
3fd placed 03-03-05 transferred to adoption cs this wk
I can't imagine that you have to "check in" with every move you make. You are integrating this child into your family, take them with you. Also, consider finding out the denomination of the child and see if someone can take them to a church of that denomination. Just because it is not your beliefs, doesn't make it wrong. But, ultimately, you are their care giver, you should not have to inform the SW or anyone of any movements you make within your city, unless it is directly relative to the health or safety of the child.