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I am trying to find a few good books that deal with adoption, bonding, and attachment issues. Anyone have a good book that they found helpful? Thanks!
**Adoptive Parenting From the Ground Up by Katie Prigel Sharp
This is our #1 most highly recommended book. When many of us began our journies, resources on adoptive parenting, brain development and other issues critical for the infant who waited were found to be sorely lacking. This book explains the science behind early brain development and applies it to adoptive families in a friendly, honest, and positive manner. We believe that EVERY ADOPTIVE PARENT should read this book.
Adoption Parenting; Creating a Toolbox, Building Connections by Jean MacLeod & Shenna Macrae
This BRAND NEW book (July 2006) is jam-packed full of information on adoption parenting. At just over 500 pages, it's all in here! Topics include: sleep, claiming, language, food, baggage, discipline, loss & grief, transitions, siblings, narratives, learning, school, race, older child adoption, challenges, support, therapy, & journey. This book is a must-read for parents at every point in the adoption journey. It is destined to become a classic.
**Attaching in Adoption; Practical Tools for Today's Parents by Deborah D. Gray
Highly recommended introduction to the attachment process.
**Becoming a Family; Promoting Healthy Attachments with Your Adopted Child by Lark Eshleman
An EXCELLENT, quick introduction to the topic of attachment in international adoption. This book answers just about every attachment question imaginable:
1. Why do attachment problems happen?
2. What preventative methods can the adoptive parent use?
3. Who should come to the airport?
4. How long should you keep friends/family away while you work on bonding?
5. What should you do about sleep?
6. Are young babies adopted from foster care situations at risk for attachment problems? Why?
**Holding Time by Martha G. Welch, MD
Although this book was not written to specifically address adoption, it introduces a strategy designed to promote bonding between any mother and child. For many of us, holding time was a first positive step toward attachment.
It is important to note, however, that children who are adopted may react more intensely to the holding experience than other children. This article explains some of the differences: [URL="http://www.adoptionparenting.net/holding.pdf"]"Holding" - Emotionally or Physically Should be One In the Same[/URL]
**Todder Adoption; the Weaver's Craft by Mary Hopkins-Best
Although this book covers toddler adoption (and is a must-read for those adopting toddlers), adoptive parents of attachment impaired infants have found that they can relate to much of the book as their babies grow.
[url=http://www.a4everfamily.org]A4everFamily.org - HOME[/url] and [url=http://www.attach-china.org]Attach-China[/url] are two great websites as well...
If you had to get just one book...Attaching in Adoption would be my vote...
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]**Attaching in Adoption; Practical Tools for Today's Parents by Deborah D. Gray
Highly recommended introduction to the attachment process.
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]**Becoming a Family; Promoting Healthy Attachments with Your Adopted Child by Lark Eshleman
An EXCELLENT, quick introduction to the topic of attachment in international adoption. This book answers just about every attachment question imaginable:
1. Why do attachment problems happen?
2. What preventative methods can the adoptive parent use?
3. Who should come to the airport?
4. How long should you keep friends/family away while you work on bonding?
5. What should you do about sleep?
6. Are young babies adopted from foster care situations at risk for attachment problems? Why?
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS][/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS]**Holding Time by Martha G. Welch, MD
Although this book was not written to specifically address adoption, it introduces a strategy designed to promote bonding between any mother and child. For many of us, holding time was a first positive step toward attachment.
It is important to note, however, that children who are adopted may react more intensely to the holding experience than other children. This article explains some of the differences:
[/FONT]
[URL="http://www.adoptionparenting.net/holding.pdf"][FONT=Comic Sans MS]"Holding" - Emotionally or Physically Should be One In the Same[/FONT][/URL][FONT=Comic Sans MS] [/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS]**Adoptive Parenting From the Ground Up by Katie Prigel Sharp
This is our #1 most highly recommended book. When many of us began our journies, resources on adoptive parenting, brain development and other issues critical for the infant who waited were found to be sorely lacking. This book explains the science behind early brain development and applies it to adoptive families in a friendly, honest, and positive manner. We believe that EVERY ADOPTIVE PARENT should read this book.
[/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS]Adoption Parenting; Creating a Toolbox, Building Connections by Jean MacLeod & Shenna Macrae
This BRAND NEW book (July 2006) is jam-packed full of information on adoption parenting. At just over 500 pages, it's all in here! Topics include: sleep, claiming, language, food, baggage, discipline, loss & grief, transitions, siblings, narratives, learning, school, race, older child adoption, challenges, support, therapy, & journey. This book is a must-read for parents at every point in the adoption journey. It is destined to become a classic.
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]The books are in MY order of preference...if you could only get one, get Attaching in Adoption...[/FONT]
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]Two websites... [url=http://www.attach-china.org]Attach-China[/url] & [url=http://www.a4everfamily.org]A4everFamily.org - HOME[/url] .[/FONT]
I second the attaching in adoption book. It is a good book but you do have to pick out what will be relevent to your case since some of the books is geared towards adopting older chilren. Check out the REVIEW section of the forum and there are some more books there.
Hugs
[FONT=Comic Sans MS]Quick note...please do not dismiss info based on age of a child...if and it is a big IF your child struggles many of the issues listed for older kids and even toddlers may very well apply. My DS was 8 months and 1 day old when placed in out arms. Adapt any advice or suggestions to be age appropriate but please do not bypass info simply based on age. [/FONT]
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]Here are some more and a couple of pretty 'hard-core' books...great to read...just in case. The first three would be MY top priority. Again do not be put off by the age or word toddler...many parents of kids who do struggle can attest that their infants did display some of the issues mentioned. Some of these are pretty scary but God forbid you end up with the child who displays these behaviors...you will know it was time very well spent reading these books. It is very rare to have this happen in such young infants...but it can and does and you simply will never know if it will be you and your child until they are home. [/FONT]
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**Todder Adoption; the Weaver's Craft by Mary Hopkins-Best
Although this book covers toddler adoption (and is a must-read for those adopting toddlers), adoptive parents of attachment impaired infants have found that they can relate to much of the book as their babies grow.
Adopting A Toddler: What Size Shoes Does She Wear?
Adopting A Toddler is a comprehensive guide for those who have decided to adopt a toddler and want to know what to do next. The practical advice offered here was written with the unique needs of adopted toddlers in mind; combined with personal experience. This book includes such topics as naming your toddler, baby showers, waiting to complete your adoption, the toddler wardrobe, the nursery, child safety, childcare, mealtime, bath time, selecting a pediatrician, medical considerations for adopted children, international adoption, adoption travel, post adoption, resources and more. If you're a first time parent, believe me -- this is the practical "how to, how much, when, where and why" guide to preparing for and welcoming your toddler home. Highly recommended
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Building the Bonds of Attachment: Awakening Love in Deeply Troubled Children by Daniel Hughes
Hughes wrote this fictional story to describe the life of a child with RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder). In it he takes you though years of failed foster homes and failed therapies until the right diagnosis is made and the child starts getting help. Commentary helps the reader to understand why some traditional parenting techniques and therapeutic methods fail while the appropriate ones can lead to immense success. It's a fascinating read and although the child is older and has more severe attachment issues than most of our families are dealing with, it aptly illustrates the principles behind good treatment.
Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood; Practical Parenting from Birth to Six Years by Jim Fay & Charles Fay
Effective, warm approach to parenting. Techniques are especially effective with challenging children.
**Parenting the Hurt Child; Helping Adoptive Families Heal and Grow by Gregory C. Keck and Regina M. Kupecky
Lists dozens and dozens of concrete ideas to nurture adoptive children.
When Love is Not Enough; A Guide to Parenting Children with RAD by Nancy Thomas
In attachment therapy, this was the first book that our psychologist suggested we read. The first several pages explain what causes attachment disorders and lists high risk signs in infants and keys to bonding. Although later content focuses primarily on older children (although parents of preschoolers may want to check out "strong sitting"), Thomas does help parents to understand the concept of taking control in order to help the attachment impaired child to feel safe.
Therapeutic Parenting; It's a Matter of Attitude! by Deborah Hage, MSW
This book is small, but mighty! Deborah Hage, a renowned attachment therapist, and a mother to two children by birth, seven children by adoption, and therapeutic foster parent to five other children, presents an immense amount of information on how to parent a child with attachment issues. Her experience with one of her own sons, adopted at six months of age, has given her insight into what life is like as the parent of a child with attachment disorder. The suggestions are concrete and can be used immediately.
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