how do I tell my parents that I've reunited with my birth father?

I am an adoptive stepmom, but I will give you my two cents anyway! If my adopted stepson told me that he was in contact with him birthmom again, would I be hurt? Yes. Would I like it? Not at all. But would I understand his need to do so, to get answers to the questions that I know he has in his heart and his head, absolutely. Do I think that in the end she would end up disappointing him all over again, eventually yes, but that is something that he would have to see on his own as an adult. Just because I do not like her for what she has done to him, does not mean that he never has to forgive her. I would let your parents know that this has nothing to do with either one of them. That your birthfather left when you were very little, and you have a lot of unanswered questions, and mixed feelings about him, and you need to be able to sort those out on your own. They don't have to like it, but it would be appreciated if they would respect your decision. If there is a part of you that is missing, and you feel that this is the way that you can fill in those gaps and make yourself feel complete, and can explain that to your family, I would believe that eventually they will accept your decision. [url=http://stepparent.adoptionblogs.com]Stepparent Adoption Blog[/url]

I think the hardest thing about stepparent adoption is the history of hurt and conflict that seems to be a part of almost every story. It can be hard for a parent to separate their own pain, anger and regret, from the child's need to understand their own history and make their own future for themselves. I'm the adoptive stepmom. For my hubby, it took years of slow healing to get to where he's truly just let it all go. For me, the first contact was when I had to face- emotionally- that I am not and can never be biologically related to my son, and that there is another woman who is also his mother. That was hard to face and took some time and some tears to work through. So it's possible, but not likely, that you'll get an immediate happy response, but try to understand that each of them is going to have to face something painful associated with that reality and will need some time to work through it. Be patient with each other and hopefully, it will all be okay.