post institute?

I am sorry that some of you received bad therapy. I really am. However, one bad AT does not make them all bad. Just as one over-zealous Christian does make them all bad or one poor surgeon does not mean all surgeons should be avoided.I have never met Bryan Post, but based on what I have read about him, I would not chose him as my therapist. I don't agree with his techniques. Others disagree with me.I have been to the therapists that are sited on the website that you referenced ([url=http://www.childrenintherapy.org/]Advocates for Children in Therapy - Home[/url]). They DO NOT do that type of therapy. In fact, I just returned from therapy with one of the therapists listed on that sight. My daughter was treated with nothing but love and care. "Holding therapy" does not mean that it is done against the child's will. It has a reputation that is untrue. It is not rebirthing. It is not laying on top of your child. Yes, my daughter is held, but don't you hold your children when they experience pain???? My daughter was working through some very painful experiences and I held her. I held her just as you hold your children. I rocked her and stroked her lovingly and let her know that I was there. Is that really abusive? I don't see it. There was no coercion.This has nothing to do with healing. In my case, its about making my daughter's life better. Better is relative. She will probably never "heal". But without getting through her trauma and realizing that she must let go of the past and move forward, she cannot have a better life. My goal is not to have her attach to me because I need it. My goal is to have her attach to me because she needs it. She must learn to trust in order to have a happy life. I don't want people to read this thread and get the impression that all AT are like what is presented here. That is not the case. Yes, there are some bad ones. Probably some abusive ones. I have not met them, but I have no doubt they are out there. There are bad doctors, bad social workers, bad everything. But please don't let one bad apple spoil the entire bunch.I would never recommend going to a therapist who says that they are "cure all". I would never go to a therapist who guilts me into it. The therapists listed on that website (that I have gone to) have never done that. In fact, I had one therapist say that she was not the best for my child. She recommended a go to another therapist who is better with the issues that my child presents with. I am an educated woman. I research for my child constantly. I do not fall for "brain washing". I And for it to be insinuated that I do is insulting.

I just returned home from a session with a therapist quoted on the site referenced above ([url]http://www.childrenintherapy.org/)[/url]. I hope that all readers of this thread realize that anything can be taken out of context and be presented in a bad light. I mean, there are over-zealous Christians, does that mean that Christianity is bad? There are poor surgeons, does that mean that you should avoid surgery? One bad apple should never spoil the entire bunch.I have never met Bryan Post. However, I have read his writings and I, personally, would not use him as my therapist. I do not agree with his premise. Others disagree and that’s ok. But never should you judge all therapists by one. All of these AT have different techniques. Its up to the parent to find the one that best matches their child’s needs.My therapist does nothing like what is presented in the above referenced website. “Holding therapy” is not about rebirthing or laying on your child or tickling or licking or whatever else is said. I have never seen this done. It is about HOLDING. Don’t you hold your child? I never realized that holding my child was abuse. Its not coercive, its not against her will. Its done with love and compassion. She could get up at any time. How do you see that as wrong??? You don’t have your child ever sit in your lap and rock them?When we were with our therapist earlier this week, we were working on my daughter’s trauma. Do you not hold your child when they hurt? Do you not cry with your child when they cry? I don’t see that as abusive, I see it as compassionate. Please explain to me how that is wrong.I could research the web and find sites that are against most anything. On the same hand I could find sites for anything. I think we all know to not take the web as the “end all, be all.”My therapist would never say that they are the “end all, be all”. They would never guilt me into to going to them. I have never experienced that. I don’t want my daughter to attach to me because it is what I want, I want her to attach to me because an attachment with a mom is the foundation of all future attachments. Whether its me, or another “mom”, I don’t care, I just want her to have the very best life she can have. My daughter will probably never “heal”. But if I can help her work through her past trauma and decide to move forward, I have succeeded. And if you disagree with that, I am sorry.I am not a victim of “brainwashing” or being “sucked into a cult”. I am an educated woman, who researched the best way to help my child. I am insulted that you continue to attack my method of aiding my daughter. Please let it go.

I watched the video. Doesn't look like any attachment therapy I've ever participated in, nor would I let a therapist touch my child like that. There are bad therapists of ALL kinds and there are very good ones in ALL fields. Bashing all AT because there are bad AT doesn't make sense to me. I'm thrilled kids heal without attachment therapy. Mine weren't able to.

Well, that video was appalling, but I wouldn't want people to think that is a typical attachment therapy experience.

like I always said, some attachment therapy is fine, but others i find abusive. this guy, Neil Feinberg is an Attachment Therapist in Evergreen, Colorado. I guess thats why I go crazy when I see this kind of stuff. Some of the therapies that go on is just abusive in my opinion. You need to be real careful if you go to an attachment threapist. The minute they say "your child wont heal without it" then you run!!!!!!!! because its not true.

Until you meet Neil Feinburg in person, you cannot judge from a video. Taken out of context, there are many things that everyone says that sound abusive. He is a very compassionate person and he loves the clients he works with. You should know to NEVER base an absolute opinion on something posted on the internet.

lorraine, I think you keep thinking that I am attacking what you do with your daughter. I am not. My therapist would never say that they are the end all, be allӔ. They would never guilt me into to going to them. I have never experienced that Thats my point, some do.....I dont make this stuff up. lorraine My therapist does nothing like what is presented in the above referenced website lucyjoy Doesn't look like any attachment therapy I've ever participated in, nor would I let a therapist touch my child like that. thats the point of the argument. That this type of attachment therapy (which this is considered AT) is on the cuff of abusive. This is the 'in your face' stuff that I am talking about. This is what the 'anti-AT' people are talking about. This is what the 'professionals' are against. I am glad I posted the link, because that is what we are talking about when we say its abusive and people need to be careful. Alot of people on here say "your child needs to go to an attachement therapist." us 'antis' are saying 'be real careful', then you come back and get mad at us. This video and the others is what we are against. These practices happen in AT today, as one poster commented on. There is nothing being taken out of context. Some therapists are good, some are not, and because its AT you need to be real careful. Most parents go to AT are already warn out and tired and very vulnerable, they just need to be careful and look for warning signs. I think the most of us, at least from what I read you posted, are on the same page, for now anyway. Its these type of practices that go on and people need to be aware of them. THe parents are educated also, they are just so darn tired and sufferred their own PTSD with their own child, that they will just about do anything if someone tells them it will help.

sorry, I sent my post before you wrote yours. never mind. I am done discussing this kind of therapy. Good luck.

OMG! That video is horrible! "You cannot judge from a video"????? I can from that video.

Attachment therapy has changed and evolved along with scientific research. To take an old video and use it to say that attachment therapy and holding therapy are wrong and abusive does not make sense to me.We have used PARTS of what is seen in that video. Our daughter kicked to release to her anger and she loved it. It was safe way for her to vent and she felt better afterward. She has done remarkably well, and I can credit it to the techniques I have learned from Nancy Thomas and several other amazing therapists. She would not be the wonderful child she is without them.HOWEVER, and this is where so many people get stuck, I'm not saying that these techniques will work for every child. Just as no "normal" parenting technques work for every child.Dad, you have made it very clear that you do not agree with holding therapy. I get that, it's your choice. However, saying that those of us who have used it are abusing our children is completely out of line. You have never met me or my child or seen how I parent, so you can not make a judgement on what I do based on what I write here. I have met several of my list mates here live and in person. I know that they are amazingly wonderful, caring and committed parents. I greive for how hard they try for their kids and that they have to constantly look for what will help their child. To call them child abusers is out of line.You take my quotes out of context and put them on "the other site" under your other name. I fully expect you to. I know that none of this will change your mind, and you will continue to advocate against holding therapy. That's your choice. It would certainly be appreciated if you would consider a parents feelings and the struggles they have with their child before you hurl insults at them.As for the initial topic here, which has been completely lost because this has turned into a bash holding therapy thread again, is the Bryan Post question. Bryan Post is not my cup of tea, and I wouldn't use his techniques. That's not to say there is not validity in some of what he is doing or that some of his techniques will not help some kids. In attachment therapy, as with every type of parenting, you have to research and find out what will work best for your child. Most times it is a ala carte type of thing. You take some things from Nancy Thomas, some things from Greg Keck, some things Dan Huges, or whatever other therapists there are, and piece them together to best fit your child. Each child is different, as is each parent. There is no magic one size fits all "cure" for our kids.

I agree with Lorraine - those of you who haven't met or worked with Neil should not be judging him or his methods based on a 3-minute pieced-together segment on YouTube. I know Neil to be a kind and good-hearted man who cares very much about deeply troubled children. To see him portrayed as he is being on this thread is unfair and just plain wrong. Disagree with what you see in that video all you want, but you should not base your opinion of him, his practice, or AT in general on a short, spliced segment of a therapy session from who-knows-how-long ago.