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Hi all, I'm new here :)
My husband and I have been together now for 3 almost 4 years, married for almost one. My divorce was final in the summer of 2005 and I have 2 kids with my ex. My husband and I have lived in Montana almost all of the time we've been together and he has been raising my girls with me (and we have one together). My girls were very young when I left my ex. 4 years old and 18 months old. So he has been in their lives a long time and like with my younger daughter, the only man she knows as her father. They both call him daddy and absolutely adore him. My ex hasn't made much if any effort to contact my girls. Almost all contact has been initiated by myself and he hasn't seen them in almost two years. He got remarried about a month before I did and she has a son the same age as my oldest that she gave up for adoption at birth. She has absolutely no interest in my girls and hates the fact that I have kids with him. She wants the man all to herself and will take him to every state except mine and then flaunt it in her blog because she knows I'll find out about it. My girls aren't a priority to either of them and never have been.
Well, this week he has decided he is "done with me" and wants to sign over the girls as quickly as possible. My girls of course are heartbroken and crushed, specifically my oldest who remembers him somewhat, but on that same note are thrilled that my husband will officially be their daddy.
Anyway, I am wondering what to expect? We're hoping to get the papers filed this week. I'm having to do all of the legwork myself since we can't afford a lawyer so I've been relying on Google a lot and it's just not telling me all I need to know.
I'm told my girls will be questioned by the judge and I am thinking about taking them to see a child psych for evals before we go in just to make sure that is done before it gets asked of us.
How long does the process take? What kind of questions will they ask? What are they looking for? Will they tell us no because we cuss a lot around the kids and spank them on occasion? (My girls are very well behaved lol our foul mouths fortunately DON'T get repeated! lol)
What else should I know and be prepared for? Any and all information is greatly appreciated, thank you in advance!!
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If he is willing, you do not have to do as much. On this group there is forms you can print off for consented relinquishment. MUCH easier, than the going to court way. He signs, you file and wait.... DONE. I hope that you can go that way. IF not, if you are a public record state, go to the court house and tell them you want a step parent adoption case. They have to give it to you, if it is a open state. Make copies, and change all info to your kids names. That is how my sister did her adoption, and it was a out of country one.
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