2 working parents and fostering

I am single and work. I only work part time right now and I have an extremely flexible work schedule. I am up for a new job that is full time and a fixed schedule. I too worry about being able to do it. I talked with my godmother and grandma who are willing to jump in and help when needed. They need to have background checks to be a babysitter for me but other than that, it isn't too hard. I'd recommending asking your friends and family if they'd be able to help you on out sick days, dr's apps, etc if you think work won't be as flexible.

Thanks! I appreciate your comment. I'm sure that my hubby and I will feel the same shock with having no children to poof...having someone that we are responsible for! We are having our pre-certification interview on March 3rd, so we will see how that goes. I think communication will be the key! Thanks again!

Thanks for the suggestion! My parents live about 10 min away so they are definitely going to certify for respite providers! :) Hope you get a placement soon!

My husband and I both work and have had our current placement for 7 months. Our FK are 10 and 22 months old. Once we became licensed, I was very forthcoming with my boss about the need to have some flexibility in my schedule should we get a call for a placement. My company is very famiy oriented and very supportive of our decision to foster. We are actually foster/adopt and are fortunate that we got our placement on a Friday afternoon, so we had some time to work out details and to try and make the kids comfortable. I did a lot of preliminary leg work even before we got our placement. I contacted a local agency that tracks all of the daycare facilities in our area and got a list of all of the licensed facilities within our particular area. I contacted many of them to explain that we were foster parents and inquired about their waiting lists, etc. just to have an idea. So we had an easy transition to daycare. As for Drs. appointments and court appointments, I go to everything. I either use vacation or personal time or I make up my hours during the week. Just recently I started working 3 days a week instead of 5, so I have a lot more flexibility and I make sure to always schedule appointments on days that the kids have visits with their BM so that they aren't spending a ton of time in the car. It is definitely doable to have two working parents and be foster parents as well. It's really no different than being a 2 parent working household with bio kids, except foster kids tend to have more appointments. You can make it work. It sounds as though you are doing a great job to prepare. Best of luck to you and hopefully you won't wait long before your first placement!

We both worked full time. Each placement one of us would either take vacation time for a few days or I would take FMLA time. By our fourth placement we realized we were just TOO stretched. I left work and went back to school nights (it had been on the cards anyway). We really tried to make it work but while fostering we had a lot of little notice placements, and some of the kids only stayed for a bit, would go home, I would go back to work for a few days and get another call - did not do so well for my career! When our boys came home DH stayed home for 2 weeks and then I stayed home for a month - they really needed that. The problem we had is the agency requires any babysitter to submit to background checks, an interview and a home inspection - all paid by us - so we could not just call up a friend or relative to help us out. The other problem was that when the kids came they NEVER had vaccination records, so I could not get them into a day care center or school until I got them - which would mean at least a week with no care. Once I was nights and hubby was days it really worked well but with us both on the same schedule it was more then we could handle.

Thank you for your honesty. I'm sure that we would be wise to anticipate some frusturating times.

That's a great idea about getting daycare information. I have started looking at schools to see which ones in our area have afterschool programs but haven't tackled the daycare thing yet. That would be nice to get a placement on a Friday. I do have flexibility but my boss is not used to me not being available for her all the time so I anticipate some growing pains with the change. I know we can make it work...Thanks!

My husband and I also both work full time and are nervous about making this work. We've requested a child or two child sibling group ages 0-4. We have a 5 year old bio son, so we're already used to dealing with sick kids and appts, but I think there will be a lot more with the foster kids. We've lined up a few daycares with different age openings, and now we're just waiting. I think we're a few weeks from getting our license. Did you get a placement yet?

I have a different take on this lately. It has become very stressful trying to work FT and meet all of my kids needs. The fact is, foster children have all had loss in one form or another and most have seen unimaginable things or had those things done to them personally. Being a foster parent is so much more than just giving a child a place to live, feeding them and making sure they go to school and the dr. They have special needs, ALL of them. They need both quality and QUANTITY time where their care giver is totally tuned in and not distracted by other things. I guess what I am saying is that I have caught myself getting angry with my kids because they are demanding my attention and they NEED me sooooo much. I have really had to come to terms with the fact that (for me) taking these two kids into our family and then being too busy to give them the attention they need is wrong of me. I can't go have lunch with them at school or go on a field trip. At night I am exhasted and thinking about getting dinner ready, kitchen cleaned up, laundry, packing lunches for the next day, lesson planning for my class and writing notes for my kids to go to after care because my baby has to go to the dr again and I can only take her after work!!! ahhhhh no wonder I snap at my kids when they ask me to come color with them! COLOR? who has time for that? I posted originally that the OP should check with her boss etc, and that is a good idea but, it's really not about making the meetings or court dates or visits. It's not about being able to take off work when they're sick or the busyness of all the apts. It's about being able to go outside and play with your kids after school because you have had the whole day to do all those household chores I mentioned above. This is just how I am feeling right now and I don't condemn people who have 2 working parents. I would just caution you to keep a check on yourself about whether your children really are getting what they need from you. Be ready to give up that awesome job to do the awesome job of healing a wounded child and watching them bloom. I gave my notice at work that, when the school year is over, I am at the very least cutting back to 3 days a week and possibly quiting all together (haven't decided). I look forward to having at least two days a week this summer that I can spend slashing in the pool with my kids!

I really appreciate you honesty! You make some very good points; ones that I will definitely ponder. And it reminds me also that we can really only handle one child at a time!!! Thanks for the insight!

Glad you took that ok! I think everyone has to work out what is best for their own family and it sounds like you are really putting a lot of thought into this, which is great. I guess if I had a housekeeper to clean and do my laundry it would make working bearable, fat chance!!

my DH and I have been fostering (to adopt) for 5 months now. We both work full time. putting aside the general debate as to whether working parents are better than SAHMs, there's not much difference Things to note: 1) if possible, stagger your work days to minimize the time without coverage. Its been a huge help for us. Our work/commute overlap is only 4 hours 2) ask to speak with your local FAPA. While you need to be licensed before having access as a member, the volunteers there are often willing to speak with prospective fosters. As foster/adoptive parents themselves, they have a better perspective that the LA/CWs. You should be able to google FAPA and your state to find a contact. 3) Know your rights/requirements. I'm doing a cross state foster (to adopt). I get quarterly requests to travel 2 hours (one way, during the day) for meetings. Most are optional, but not presented as such. I now turn in written reports instead of trying to figure out how to make a meeting that could have been done over the phone 4) Have a plan for times when you are at work. Drs visits, sick days, therapy, court dates will happen. You may want to speak with your HR dept do get FMLA approved. My company is willing to let me go under "personal time", instead of using up vacation days (be careful with FMLA as some companies require you to use up all vacation time before it kicks in. And note, you aren't getting paid for FMLA days.) 5) Know your life will never be the same. just be flexible and go with the flow. I thought I was busy before. If you told me I'd be able to squeeze gymnastics, swimming lessons, birthday party, play time, and a trip into Boston to see a puppet show in one day - I would have said you're crazy. Fostering is ultimately a leap of faith. And I've never regretted it for a second

Hi. My husband and I have fostered for 2 years now and he is a business owner and I am an elementary principal. The key is a good daycare. It is very doable. We enjoy it greatly. Our social worker knows that we work and before we accept a placement, we have to consider if this child will fit into our busy lifestyle. Most do, but some don't and we have to pass on those placements. We are in foster care to adopt as well. Good luck!

Hey CP. I just happened to be fostering and retired. However, I have a best friend here that does fostering, and she and her husband work. Just don't take in too many children and become overwhelmed. She did! She took in a seven year old, and then they called with a 9month old and two year old. It was really overwhelming for her, especially after the nine month old contracted a respiratory infection and had to be hospitalized. So it can work out well but start out slow. Good luck!

My DH and I both work and we have an 19 month old FD right now that we've had for 5 months. She is not our first placement and we've always worked. I refuse to quit my job because I love it. (I'm a teacher.) DH makes the higher salary, and his job provides our insurance, so he has to work as well. One of us not working is not an option. We make it work. Fortunately, the SW, CW, and such have always worked with us to accommodate around our work schedules and we make most appts for after 3:30p when I get off work. When FD got pink eye, the SW helped us find a "respite" for that day so we could still go to work. We also have my mom, who helps if we need her to. FD goes to day care Mon-Fri and has since the day we brought her home. She still recognizes us and is attached to us. When we pick her up from daycare, she comes running to us. Fortunately for us also, in our state, day care is covered by the state, as is respite. An aide transports our FD to and from her visits with her BP; in fact, we're not even allowed to transport to or from a visit until after transition home has begun. DH and I have always fostered one child at a time and always under 2 years of age. We have had a baby before and we worked then. He went to day care as well. He was very attached to us, and we were very attached to him. Sorry it's such a long reply. Hope it helps.