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I wonder.... During those months that you "went away" in the days when closed adoptions were the only choice and the "problem" you had was so shameful that you had to be separated from your family and your life... Who do you remember? I stayed at Bethany Home in Memphis, Tennessee from mid-August 1983 until Mid-October 1983 when I gave birth to my first born son, whom I have never seen again, and long for with my very soul. I remember the other girls there, some very vividly, and others not so much. I made good friendships with some of those that I spent 2 months of my life with, and others I remember as acquaintances. I remember my best friend there - her name was Denise. I can't remember her last name, (and wouldn't put it here for the sake of her privacy). She was from Georgia, I believe, and I remember what a Southern (and very country) drawl she had. We used to sit on the front porch in the swing and talk for hours. I wrote to her once after we both went home, and then we lost touch, but I remember her and she has a special place in my heart because of the time we spent together.Then there was Robin and Belinda - they roomed together and were there before me - they were good buds. I remember Belinda smoked - and looking back, I think WHY IN THE WORLD would they let 16 year old expectant moms smoke??? But, they did. Robin was from up north somewhere, maybe from Michigan, and she had a northern accent that I thought was so funny! I loved to listen to her talk and try to mimic that accent. I remember Sue - she was "older" and I could never understand why a 30-something year old woman had to go into "hiding" in order to have a baby. She ended up being the one that went into the labor room with me as a coach - even though I had planned on having Denise in there with me, for some reason, she wasn't available when I went to the hospital, or came later, or something, so Sue went in with me. I remember Denise being there in the waiting room, just not in my room with me. That is one regret I have - I should have gotten her to come in there with me. Another lady was over 30 - her name was Mary. I didn't really make good friends with her, and I remember that she had a room all to herself instead of having to room with anyone else - also she had a queen size or double bed instead of the little twin ones that we all slept on.There was a girl named Nina there when I first arrived, and she had to be induced after I was there a few days because she had Toxemia. She was in my room. The other girl in my room was Lisa - I remember she was very quiet, a little mean, and really short. She was an eye-roller, who seemed to think everyone was dumb or something. Needless to say I wasn't big pals with her, though we got along - we all played "Spades" a lot, and Lisa was the QUEEN! I think she had a tough exterior as protection, at least looking back that's what I think.And let me see.... There were 2 Vickie's - #1 was so funny! She just completely cracked me up with her stories, and her real down to earth view of things. She was someone who spoke it just like it was, never holding back. I adored her. The other Vickie had some kind of skin problem where she itched all the time and her skin came off all over the place - we would have to sweep it up off the floor. She always wore bandanas and scarfs on her head. I loved her too, but she didn't make me laugh as much as Vickie #1.Then there was the STAFF!! For some reason, I have no memory of the nurse's name, or any of the clinicians who kept the office up front, but I remember Ms. Elizabeth, our cook. OH how I loved Ms. Elizabeth!! She was an older black lady and boy could she take care of us girls. She was someone I loved to hang out with in the kitchen and hear her stories, and she really showed love to me at a time when I felt very unlovable. I will never forget Ms. Elizabeth. And also, Alpha, our housekeeper - I will remember her forever. She was someone that I really grew to love in those 2 long months. And lastly, Ms. Rennie Porter, who was our driver and "House Mom". She took us everywhere - doctors, hospitals, Vo-Tech, wherever we needed to go. She would haul us all down to Zayre on Poplar near Tillman to shop every few weeks. It did me some good to get out in public so that I didn't feel like a caged animal. Thank you, Ms. Porter, I remember you. I think about these girls from time to time, and wonder if they remember me, or if they are on this forum, and what they are doing now. Have any of them been reunited with the children you had to surrender? Are you one of the girls I mentioned here, and remember the same people I mentioned?Bethany Home has been leveled to the ground some years ago - I visited the site a few years ago and walked the grounds but all that is left is the circle drive and a sign out front (that was erected after I left). You can see it from Google earth - just a plot of land at 901 Chelsea Avenue.Hey girls. If you're out there, hope you are doing well.I just wonder - any other birthmom's from the closed era remember your stays away from home when you were sent away, and the people who touched your life while you were there? Who do you remember? Who made a lasting impression on your life?
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I wonder.... During those months that you "went away" in the days when closed adoptions were the only choice and the "problem" you had was so shameful that you had to be separated from your family and your life... Who do you remember? I stayed at Bethany Home in Memphis, Tennessee from mid-August 1983 until Mid-October 1983 when I gave birth to my first born son, whom I have never seen again, and long for with my very soul. I remember the other girls there, some very vividly, and others not so much. I made good friendships with some of those that I spent 2 months of my life with, and others I remember as acquaintances. I remember my best friend there - her name was Denise. I can't remember her last name, (and wouldn't put it here for the sake of her privacy). She was from Georgia, I believe, and I remember what a Southern (and very country) drawl she had. We used to sit on the front porch in the swing and talk for hours. I wrote to her once after we both went home, and then we lost touch, but I remember her and she has a special place in my heart because of the time we spent together.Then there was Robin and Belinda - they roomed together and were there before me - they were good buds. I remember Belinda smoked - and looking back, I think WHY IN THE WORLD would they let 16 year old expectant moms smoke??? But, they did. Robin was from up north somewhere, maybe from Michigan, and she had a northern accent that I thought was so funny! I loved to listen to her talk and try to mimic that accent. I remember Sue - she was "older" and I could never understand why a 30-something year old woman had to go into "hiding" in order to have a baby. She ended up being the one that went into the labor room with me as a coach - even though I had planned on having Denise in there with me, for some reason, she wasn't available when I went to the hospital, or came later, or something, so Sue went in with me. I remember Denise being there in the waiting room, just not in my room with me. That is one regret I have - I should have gotten her to come in there with me. Another lady was over 30 - her name was Mary. I didn't really make good friends with her, and I remember that she had a room all to herself instead of having to room with anyone else - also she had a queen size or double bed instead of the little twin ones that we all slept on.There was a girl named Nina there when I first arrived, and she had to be induced after I was there a few days because she had Toxemia. She was in my room. The other girl in my room was Lisa - I remember she was very quiet, a little mean, and really short. She was an eye-roller, who seemed to think everyone was dumb or something. Needless to say I wasn't big pals with her, though we got along - we all played "Spades" a lot, and Lisa was the QUEEN! I think she had a tough exterior as protection, at least looking back that's what I think.And let me see.... There were 2 Vickie's - #1 was so funny! She just completely cracked me up with her stories, and her real down to earth view of things. She was someone who spoke it just like it was, never holding back. I adored her. The other Vickie had some kind of skin problem where she itched all the time and her skin came off all over the place - we would have to sweep it up off the floor. She always wore bandanas and scarfs on her head. I loved her too, but she didn't make me laugh as much as Vickie #1.Then there was the STAFF!! For some reason, I have no memory of the nurse's name, or any of the clinicians who kept the office up front, but I remember Ms. Elizabeth, our cook. OH how I loved Ms. Elizabeth!! She was an older black lady and boy could she take care of us girls. She was someone I loved to hang out with in the kitchen and hear her stories, and she really showed love to me at a time when I felt very unlovable. I will never forget Ms. Elizabeth. And also, Alpha, our housekeeper - I will remember her forever. She was someone that I really grew to love in those 2 long months. And lastly, Ms. Rennie Porter, who was our driver and "House Mom". She took us everywhere - doctors, hospitals, Vo-Tech, wherever we needed to go. She would haul us all down to Zayre on Poplar near Tillman to shop every few weeks. It did me some good to get out in public so that I didn't feel like a caged animal. Thank you, Ms. Porter, I remember you. I think about these girls from time to time, and wonder if they remember me, or if they are on this forum, and what they are doing now. Have any of them been reunited with the children you had to surrender? Are you one of the girls I mentioned here, and remember the same people I mentioned?Bethany Home has been leveled to the ground some years ago - I visited the site a few years ago and walked the grounds but all that is left is the circle drive and a sign out front (that was erected after I left). You can see it from Google earth - just a plot of land at 901 Chelsea Avenue.Hey girls. If you're out there, hope you are doing well.I just wonder - any other birthmom's from the closed era remember your stays away from home when you were sent away, and the people who touched your life while you were there? Who do you remember? Who made a lasting impression on your life?
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I was there September 1985 - January 30, 1986 when my son was born; I was 14 years old. I remember Ms. Elizabeth. She genuinely loved & cared for us. I used to hang out with her in the kitchen and she taught me how to make those magical rolls! Sitting down for her meals was the best. I remember walking the circle drive everyday for at least 20 minutes... LoL. I decided to keep my son and I've never regretted that decision. He's now 35 and I have two grandkids. Now I'm 50 years old.