Adoptive Mother's Feelings Of Betrayal

I just came across this thread in Feb 2020. My heart truly goes out to you as the adoptive mother (you are his mother) The one who gave all to your son. I wanted to share with you that I am the birth mom, and my son was adopted at 3 months into a loving home, I am sure yours is also. I never laid eyes on him nor did I name him at birth. This was in 1976 and I was 15 when he was born and turned 16 the very next month. I will say however, I did want to see him. Long story short, he found me a year ago. He was 43 years old and I was 58. I would never, never, impose on the parents who raised him and gave him love and support and they as well as the rest of his family still do. His mother raised him and that is his mom. I am very cognitive to his mother's feelings. His mom and dad encouraged him to look for us (birth parents) I was able to put him in contact with his birth father also. He came to meet us and his grandfather. We still stay in touch, I follow his lead in everything. I will never and can never take the place of family he has known all of his life. He is very close to his mother. I was able to talk with her once. I just wanted to thank her for raising a fine young man. It appears your forum was written a few years ago, and I hope that things have changed. When my son first contacted and came to meet me it was exciting. I knew however that, that was just the honeymoon period. I never try to take the place of his mom, nor does the birth father try to take the place of his father. We are just happy to hear from him we we do. Be encouraged, I'm sure he didn't know how to handle the situation. Not wanting to hurt anyone My son's mom explained to him that he was blessed to be loved by so many people. I am blessed that she is open to me. I would never do anything to hurt the relationship they share. Be encouraged.