attachment issues- calls everyone "mommy"

This is, unfortunately, one of those not-enough-info situations. That could be serious-but to me personally, it might not be a huge red flag. Here's why: it may be that, at 3 yrs, she just didn't really understand the language appropriately. I don't know her background obviously, but if there is speech/language delay, she may call all adults mommy/daddy. My bio DD actually did this for about 2 weeks when she was 2 and just learning to talk (she's developmentally delayed). So it may be an issue of her not knowing the right words. On the other hand, it could be an attachment issue ranging from mild to severe. The fact that she stopped rather quickly, however, makes it seem more innocuous to me. I don't know everything though, so I'll certainly be interested to see some other opinions. Best of luck to you on your foster/adoption journey :)

3 is still young enough to not truly understand what a mommy really is or who mommy is. Especially if from birth, she's had a lot of "mommies", kwim?Given that in 3 months she is calling her foster mother the appropriate name, and is learning to identify actual strangers, that is a good sign. That doesn't mean she won't need further attachment parenting with you though, as I'm sure you know since you've already adopted an older child it seems like.My 4 were all under the age 5 and called their foster mom by her given name and had no problem calling me "mommy" when placed. However...they didn't really understand what that meant, still went to strangers and still needed to really learn what "mommy" and "family" means. We worked on attachment parenting, made their world very small and while it was a rough year in many ways, we got through it. My kids are now soon to be 12, 13, 14 & 15 years old and there is no confusion over who I am. lol.Given that you have concerns though, can you talk with the foster mom and get her thoughts? Ask her some questions and go from there?

L will be 3 next week, and has been with me since Feb 1. At this age, kiddos will call everyone in a caregiver role 'mommy'.....he has called my best friend, most of his daycare teachers, even my mom.....mommy. At that age, it is like a job title.

I don't think you can make a call based on that. When she came to us (at 1 1/2), one of our DD's very few words was "Mama". After knowing her for a few weeks, I came to think (and still do) that the word did not in fact mean Mama, but rather, it meant "milk".

Our son came to us at 2.5 and called everyone Mommy, too. It took a few months for him to get that not EVERYONE was Mommy, though he did have some indescriminate (sp?) affection for about a year. It *is* an attachment concern but it could also be a little boy who needs a stable mother-figure and nothing more. I would look for and ask about attachment issues beyond this... could be PERFECTLY normal.

Our FS called every kind adult "mummydaddy" (all one word) for a while. Poor guy couldn't even really tell difference between a "mom" and a "dad". Some it was attachment issues, some was just neglect and never being taught language. He was able to for attachments. So, I agree with the others. It could be this little one is just not sure of language. I think I would base the attachment concern more on how the child ACTS with other adults rather than what they call other adults. For example, if the child needs to be comforted do they seek it from the person parenting them or from anyone in the room? If a child is hungry do they seek their "parent" or again anyone around. I think how a 3 yo behaves is likey a better indicator of concern. If the child is upset and seeks their parent then I think that shows they do understand that "this person is who I need" rather than the words they use for people - but that is just my 2 cents.

My nephew calls me mom sometimes,he's almost 4 years old.That wouldn't concern me.