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So my sister is pregnant. Her second pregnancy, and she's 18. She terminated her first, but doesn't want to this time. But she doesn't want to raise the child either. I am older and married, my husband and I are facing the fact we may not be able to have our own babies.
So my initial reaction is I'll take the baby.... But what is the reality behind this?
What is it like to raise a siblings child? I'm nervous, this is a scary situation for all of us.
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I understand your fear. I think children have a great benefit growing up in relative care because they typically get to visit their BM and blood relatives more often than non relative children might get to.
That being said, how does the BF feel about it? Is he willing to give up his rights? If so, then you need to sit down with an attorney to find out how this will proceed (private adoption's vary by area) typically where I live, $1500.00 others much higher. Your sister should talk with an adoption counselor. Private adoptions in most states do not need to use an adoption agency which is good as they are costly. If she still wants to have you adopt her child, then definitely follow through with written legal documents. You should decide how much visitation you and your DH would be comfortable with and draw boundaries for parenting; does your sister get to argue parenting techniques with you? Can she come and go as she pleases? Does she get to take the child to whatever, whenever? Setting the boundaries will be one of the best things you can establish before the child arrives.