Any cases of a judge choosing foster family over relatives?

We tried to get ICPC on an FFS who came back into care after we moved out of state. His biological aunt also tried to get him. They did a bonding study and recommended that because he's had so many moves in his life he remain with the new foster family (we were his 2nd foster family when he came to us at 9mo, he RU'd then came back into care at 18mo). So even though the new foster family had only had him for 2m the judge order he stay with them rather than go to the relative or with us (we had him for 8m).

Boy, it's great to hear of a judge who will put what they believe is the child's best interests first. And will take bonding and moves as a serious issue.

DD had bio-relatives who passed a home study and ICPC...but the judge and children's services believed that breaking the bond DD had formed with me would have been incredibly detrimental to her. So she is ours. :-)

We (foster family) were chosen over relatives who passed a home study. Kiddo had been with us at the time 15 months. I am kinda wondering if there were some problems within the home study, but we're logically not privy to that info.

I was chosen over relative (aunt) who seemed to pass homestudy. I had them a year and have a strong bond, whereas the aunt has seen one of them about 4 times. It also helped that only one has blood ties to her, as the children are half siblings. I am keeping them together. We have not been to court though for TPR, so it is not a done deal. The SW and GAL are recommending me though. I am going to keep this aunt involved in her nieces life though. If roles were reversed, I would hope she would allow me to visit, as appropriate.

Not in my area. In my county, placement consideration is 100% up to county agency, judges/magistrates don't bother themselves with it. There was a case a few years back that made the news. Foster family brought baby home from hospital, had him almost 2.5 years. I never knew if TPR had happened and they were just waiting to finalize, but unbeknwost to them, the boy had 3 older siblings. In looking for family for that set, the county found a 60 year old great uncle and 80 year old great grandmother who wanted the sib set. When they found out about the toddler, they wanted him too. CPS was going to turn him over to these STRANGERS, who lived in another State, and who county was going to pay Foster Per Diem too for the children, until they aged out!, did I mention that they were in another state! But the foster family got an attorney and the details never came out, but they were able to either adopt or get permanent custody of baby Nick after all. Of course their days of fostering were over. Our county doesn't like when foster parents get attorneys and fight them. Here, it is all about KEEPING FAMILIES TOGETHER even if that family is several states away, had never laid eyes on the children before, and were too old to properly care for them. (Both had medical issues on top of their age!) But, the county got to check off "reuniting another happy family."I seriously considered getting an attorney myself. I called about 4 family law practices and not a single one of them would even talk to me because the girls had a GAL who SHOULD HAVE been watching out for their best interests.ETA: Here, most of our GALs are lawyers. We have CASA GALs who are not lawyers, are volunteer, but work under a formal GAL. That is what BE has but still not getting a read from her. She has made it clear she won't try and stop RU him with bio mom even though she agrees that her cognitive ability to parent does not exist.ETA2: Hah, I just realized, Chubbs has a GAL assigned. He NEVER contacted me. Not once. SO, he got his standard GAL payment, here, they are paid a certain fee with a capped hour expectation, and he did nothing at all. Thankfully for Chubbs, I am a loving and devoted parent.

I lost my fs to relatives he never met after more than two years of being his mom. The sw did not want to move him. It depends on your state.

The relatives in my case have never seen him and live several hours away. They were not interested previously but suddenly now are. The way I understand it, though, is that they have to be willing to adopt. And, I don't know if they think they are doing a home study for simply becoming his placement or if they know that adoption is a very real possibility.

my two boys who have been in my home for 17 months are going to grandma soon. She tried to get custody of them in the beginning but had some legal issues from a long time ago. The judge denied her request. She has been in there lives and when we were transitioning the boys to dad, she saw them every weekend. Recently the GAL, requested that the boys go to grandma. New judge and he agreed. We have laws that say relatives first. :(

You haven't had the baby for very many months according to your timeline. From the time the relatives were contacted who you state weren't interested (although you don't note why) to now - may have allowed them the ability to sit down and figure out "If and How" they could do it. They may very well both work full time with demanding jobs, or have several children, or a child with special needs, a older relative they are caregiving too - many more scenarios could be listed that would have to be considered in this type of decision. The fact that they took time to consider the options and what was in their heart is a positive while still being timely. To be asked out of the blue would throw anyone for a loop. I don't think a couple of months to consider the future for a relative, while knowing the babe is being safely cared for it something unreasonable. Kind regards,Dickons

I absolutely agree. You have made great points. However, there is more to this story, much of which I do not feel comfortable sharing online. We were chosen because we are an adoptive home. There is a very long history with the family because of the older children. But, yes, I realize that a few months is not that long.

I'd also like to comment from the relatives' perspective. The bios in Niece's case did not inform anyone in the family that she was taken into care. Furthermore, they told her that they would fight any placement with any of her Aunts, adult siblings, or family friends. They wanted her placed in the worst possible environment so she would suffer and want to come home. Since Niece was a teen she was able to contact me herself and I got in touch with her CW immediately (it still took a week or so) but if she were younger, I would not have known for possibly longer than several months. Bios in these cases are not great parents looking out for their children.

Our now forever daughter was supposed to go with her grandparents from the beginning. About 8 months into the case (we had her in our home from birth) we were asked if we would consider being a permanent resource for her. She has multiple medical needs, but as far as I know Grandparents passed their home study. We were chosen over them by DSS and GAL and they have been taking DSS to court since then. Our adoption was finalized last month and they still have decisions that they are appealing. The effects of their actions is that at the current time we have no contact with them and will not until the court stuff is over. I am really hoping that we will be able to one day move forward as I know they love her very much.

I have had the girls for 5 months. At three months DHS and the girl's attorney recommended the girls stay with us over going to the GGP's. Then, again at the 4 month mark they made the same recommendation. Now we have two more cases coming up where the same family, plus a few new family members, are trying to get placement/custody and so far DHS is still recommending they stay with us. Sometimes a whole family is unstable. Sometimes a psychologist who's been seeing the children can offer some additional insight about what is in the children's best interest. Sometimes the people who want them aren't bad, but bad enough. Our girls were specifically given to our home because we were willing to adopt. We've been riding out this case for over five months with the tides of family, homestudies, petitions, etc. We haven't even made it to the termination of services yet (four or five months until TPR) and we've been in court more than some people are for a whole case.

There is a difference between good, suitable relatives and then ones that, well, aren't. I've had a couple go to good situations with relatives. We supported that. I had one go to a situation that never should have happened, but a biased CW approved it. Now I have one where the relative knew about her being in foster care from day one and didn't do a thing. With the history, there's no way there would be RU. She came forward late in the game and while the home study passes (maybe?) it really is so basic. Marginal living conditions and no arrests and you pass. If you look deeper though, there are many issues and no child she has raised (or not raised) has had a stable life. Just because you've never been arrested for drugs doesn't mean you don't have a drug problem. It's more difficult to figure out if relatives suffer from mental illness if they hide it, etc. Just some examples.