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Hi everyone :)
I'm just curious about other people's experiences with paternity tests after finding/contacting their birth father. I had the good fortune of looking like a carbon copy of my birth father, so growing up there was never any doubt. (The person my birth mom named was a professional hockey player so his photographs were readily available online.)
My birth mother passed away in 2011 before I had a chance to know her, and I didn't want the same to happen with my birth father so after a bit of a search I found him and contacted him. He was shocked because he hadn't known about me (hockey players...crazy parties...wild fans...you get the idea lol) but to my surprise he was actually thrilled. He had never married or had kids, and he said when he found out about me things just kind of fit together, as if he had been missing me on a subconscious level. Needless to say I was thrilled.
However, when we received the results of our paternity test they showed that he wasn't my father. And that's where it got complicated. Upon closer observation our genes are VERY close--so much so that the Combined Relatedness Index does prove that we are related. I've been researching and researching for months on end and feel certain that several lifestyle factors are to blame for our mismatched genes. (Smoking being the largest one...it causes both germline mutations as well as damaging the smoker's buccal cells.)
The problem is, to the rest of the world (including my alleged father), I look like a crazy person for not believing a paternity test. People think I'm in denial and are more willing to give me pity than serious consideration. The thing is, I'm honestly not in denial, but because all other signs point to this man being my father I'm not ready to give up quite yet. Not when DNA research is years from being an infallible source of information. I think in criminal cases it works 100% of the time considering they're matching identical copies of someone's DNA profile. But after six months of research I have a lot less faith in paternity testing. And, forgive the stereotype, but I think the reason we don't hear more about it is because the majority of people who require paternity tests don't necessarily have the education and resources to question the results.
Sorry for this long, rambling post. My main question is if any of you have experienced anything similar to this? I'm just really sad and frustrated at this point.
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Does he have siblings? If you're certain that you are related, maybe he's your uncle.Did you contact the DNA testing service and ask them to give you an explanation of the results? They should be able to give you some explanation as to why you do seem have a relatedness to someone who is supposedly not your father.Lastly, I would check with other DNA testing sites and talk with them about your concerns and possibly do another test.If possible, you probably want to involve one of his siblings (if he has any) and his parents (if they are still alive).
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L4R
Does he have siblings? If you're certain that you are related, maybe he's your uncle.
Did you contact the DNA testing service and ask them to give you an explanation of the results? They should be able to give you some explanation as to why you do seem have a relatedness to someone who is supposedly not your father.
Lastly, I would check with other DNA testing sites and talk with them about your concerns and possibly do another test.
If possible, you probably want to involve one of his siblings (if he has any) and his parents (if they are still alive).
Maybe contact some geneticists (professors) at universities and ask them if they could help you figure things out.At this point, you need to have experts who can back up your theory. You would then be able to go back to your presumed father and tell him that Expert X and Expert Y believe that he still could be your father despite the results of the testing, and you could tell him their reasons.And, hopefully, those experts could give you a solid next step toward proving/disproving that he is your father.
I recently did a paternity test and I bought the DNA kit from Walmart, $26.88, and then $140 to get the lab results. It was through Identigene and they confirmed that my b-dad was in fact him. They give a detailed gene report as well. They also offer paternity tests that will be recognized by the courts as well. You get results 2 days after they receive them. It is simple, swab your cheeks with three different qtip that are provided. I understand with wanting to try again. I knew my b-dad was in fact my b-dad but there was that little glimmer of anxiety that he may not be. This test was very simple, accurate, and well respected within the health care community. SO if you didn't try it, it might be worth a try. If you can convince himto do it again...
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Has he ever had a transplant?
Also, he or you could be a chimera:
[url=http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/04/transplanttransfusion-donors-dna-get-integrated-new-host/]In a Transplant/Transfusion, Does the Donor's DNA Get Integrated Into the New Host?[/url]
Perhaps your bmother met your birthfather in another state? It could be his brother (if he looked a lot like his brother and she asked if he was X, he might have not denied it (if so, I am sure that he wouldn't be the first famous person's brother to get his leg over by passing himself off as famous person).
Did the DNA people say what the likelihood of relationships are? Is it is possible that the relationship could be as far as "half brother". If hockey player's father had fathered another son that looked like his famous son, perhaps he mighthave passed himself off as the hockey player (Yes, I know I'm veering off into "soap opera" territory lol)
Thanks for the response Genetically he does appear to be my Uncle but unfortunately that's impossible because his siblings have never been to my state--he was just here playing hockey.