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Hey everyone!
Just seeking advice (I do not want to hear -OH JUST DO NOT DO IT) but seeking actual helpful or encouragement.
So, my husband is a 13 year Chief in the Navy. We have been wanting to adopt the past few years; however with his schedule and the parenting classes there is no way.
This year we decided to proceed and did all the paperwork with adoption agency. It is a public agency. But now, we would have to miss 3 of the MAPPS classes with his ship going to sea! Meaning we would have to wait until the classes are offered AGAIN! This is the 7th time this has happened. I can not take them alone per DCS.
The military allows 21 days to "take off" total for adoption; however with his rate and rank he has to be on the ship if out to sea. The 21 days is used for things such as going out of state to pick up the child, child visits, to get children settled into your home and etc.
My husband will not retire until (at minimum 7 years). We do NOT want to wait that long to get the ball rolling.
Does anyone know of online classes, or telephone, video classes. ANYTHING that can be done? He has access to all this on his ship!We are going to consult with JAG officers for advice; however they take a while to see.
The adoption agency is unsure and DCS doesn't want to assist us in finding out.
I know there is a program called "deciding together" that is a little more flexible however I think you still have to go to them.
Any help or advice is appreciated. I want to at least get things started!
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Some private agencies that are infant adoption have online classes that you can take for their adoptions.
I don't know of any DCF/state agencies that do not require you to be physically present for the classes. But that is just me. I hope you find a solution!
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how about asking the MAPP instructor if he could Skype in, assuming it could be done shipboard? He'd be visible at all times and able to participate. Just a thought.
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It depends on what type of adoption you're doing. We didn't have to do any classes at all for infant adoption.
Is it a state requirement where you are? or are you planning for international or an older child? Making adjustments on that side of the equation might help you get through the process better as long as it would fit your family.
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I would echo the aspect of not needing classes to adopt an infant. Once you're home study approved, most (I think) agencies work with you wherever you are, though I'm not sure if it would be OK to be out of the country.
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We had chosen American Adoptions because they were very military friendly. We ended up adopting through a local agency who did our homestudy (no MAPP classes, instead we had to read books). My husband is also Navy and was on shore duty when our daughter was born so it was much easier. She was born in-state and he still got 21 days of leave to be home with her. I think private adoption is much more flexible with regards to your husband having to be present for legal events and such but if you choose to go through the foster system you will find that yes, the classes have to be taken in person and they have to be renewed every few years.
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