Dissociative Identity Disorder

Wow, Hunter! Definitely no BTDT, but it seems all kinds of things in our lifestyle have that "not everyone gets what this is like" feel. How did it go?

Thanks for posting - sometimes I post stuff and get no response and it feels a bit lonely! Interestingly, it was by far the best Christmas we have had. I'm not sure exactly why. It WAS fun to get things for "the littles" and have gifts from Santa and all that kind of stuff. I missed that time period as my son was older when he came to me. DID has some very interesting aspects. I'm trying to enjoy having opportunity to parent "the littles" and give my son the "childhood" he didn't have before. Some wrote a Santa letter. It started with "Dear Santa, I know you have about a bazillion kids writing to you about what they want but I'm going to ask for what I need" And he did. (We make somewhat of a big deal about the difference between wants and needs. We NEED to buy cereal and you WANT Sugar Pops, and so on) He "needed" a thick, soft blanket. Another needed mittens, another new boots, another a parka, and one asked for a light for his room so it wouldn't be so dark. Sadly not one of them, regardless of their "age" asked for toys, video games, candy or any other "want". And yes, they already had a blanket, gloves, boots, nightlight, and a jacket. But Santa came through and brought them what they asked for anyway. Saw lots of alters on Christmas morning as the various ones appeared to open a present or a stocking. They seemed very excited to be "recognized" and were all very respectful of the "others" stuff. It wasn't the holiday my friends and family had. It wasn't the holiday I might have hoped for with my son being the age he is, but it was really very nice anyway. Not sure if it's growth on my part, but I don't put the same expectations on holidays as I did prior to being the proud Mom of my son. If he likes the fiber optic tree with rotating lights, then that's what we have and I don't worry about it not matching our old farmhouse or what others may think. My son is happy. And that makes me happy. :love: Thanks for asking. It is a bit of a peculiar life we live!

Aw. I'm glad it went well! Appropriate expectations work wonders and I would definitely chalk that up as a success on your part. Half my struggles with Cricket could be remedied by better expectations on my part. It's way easier said than done!How old is your son, and how old did he arrive? I LOVE catching up on those early behaviors with my kiddos - no DID but they each have come to let themselves be babied in various ways to make up for what we missed, so I get what you mean about gifting the littles.I know next to nothing about DID - are the alters in your home for good or is there a goal of integration for your son? Is acknowledging them like you did recommended by your mental health professionals, or just what feels right in your home? Purely curious.Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Aw. I'm glad it went well! Appropriate expectations work wonders and I would definitely chalk that up as a success on your part. Half my struggles with Cricket could be remedied by better expectations on my part. It's way easier said than done! How old is your son, and how old did he arrive? I LOVE catching up on those early behaviors with my kiddos - no DID but they each have come to let themselves be babied in various ways to make up for what we missed, so I get what you mean about gifting the littles. I know next to nothing about DID - are the alters in your home for good or is there a goal of integration for your son? Is acknowledging them like you did recommended by your mental health professionals, or just what feels right in your home? Purely curious. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

My son was fifteen when he moved in, sixteen when adopted. He's 21 now. The DID is a pretty recent diagnosis. Prior to that it was just labeled dissociative. I've been advised to parent them "where they are" and so that's what I do! Interestingly, they age the longer they are out so "the littles" are not as little as they used to be - a bunch of them declared a couple of weeks ago they would be seven on January 14th. And now they are. Some alters are new, some have been "absorbed" (their word) so we're in a constant state of flux. Certainly my hope, for my son, is that he learn to take the wonderful things the littles have to offer him while still maintaining his ability to go to school, work, date, and so on. We aren't there yet. He is the smartest, bravest, funniest, hardest working human being I've ever had the pleasure to know. I'm so proud of him for getting up and putting one foot in front of the other each day. And I'm so proud to be his Mom. I wish his ability to receive treatment didn't end at the borders of our state. It's a system that needs to be fixed. If he were physically hurt and he needed specialized care the next state over, it would happen instantly. They'd medivac him to a place that can treat what he has. But because it is a mental health diagnosis it seems there are barb wire fences at each state border. Okay, end of my vent - it's been a long, discouraging day with the state ... And thanks again for asking!

What an awesome family you are. Thanks for sharing.

How many alters are there? I know what you mean about expectations...I started expecting a lot, then remembered what mine went through.

There are quite a few alters. Currently there are twenty something but only half a dozen are extremely active. Some have been and gone.