How to deal with adopted stepdaughter?

August 2, 2018

I have no kids and I don’t think I will be able to have one (medical reasons), so I agreed on adopting my stepdaughter as per my husband’s insistence.

Before the adoption, my stepdaughter was so sweet, nice, and caring to me. She was really an ideal daughter every mom would love to have. But things changed after the adoption papers came out. There are days when she will ignore me and my rules. She is no longer following curfew when his father is away on a business trip. She has totally changed from a sweet to a mean (I hate to use the word) girl. As if she’s not the stepdaughter I used to have. But there are times when she’s back to her usual but it was when she needs something from me.

I can’t tell it to my husband for I don’t want to hurt his feelings and I don’t want it to be the reason for our disagreement and misunderstanding.

I’m not sure how to deal with my stepdaughter. I’m at lost why she suddenly changed. Is there anyone out there who feels like being mistreated, used, and abused by their adopted child? Please tell me your stories so I will know how to deal with my stepdaughter .

Moira Andrews

August 6, 2018

I'm sorry, I don't have a relevant experience to share. But I understand that it's a tough situation for you. I can suggest you to try to think of ways that can make you closer to her like planning a family activity. Get her opinion and let her lay down her ideas. Give her a compliment when she shares a bright idea. Invite her too to do some girl stuff when your husband is away. Encourage her to speak up and express herself. If you can't still handle it, then, you have to let your husband know this. I guess considering a family counseling might help address this issue.