So sad. Losing contact

6 months ago, my husband and I got our first foster placement. It was a 15 year old boy with an extensive history of trauma. I became very attached to him and loved being someone that he could count on. He had a hard time coping with his anger and, eventually, became physically abusive to us both. The Department of Child Services decided that it was not safe for anyone for him to be in a foster home. They moved him to a residential facility (it will be his 4th). I wanted so much more for him than this. We were planning to adopt him. We took him to countless service providers, therapists, appointments, etc. We tried to create an environment that assured him we would always be there for him. We received nothing but praise the entire time he was with us. All we were creating for him was false hope. Dcs told me that I could still be a "positive support" for him. My husband did not want to be due to how bad the abuse became at the end. I have been regularly visiting him, talking to him on the phone, etc. Today, the facility that he is at called and said that him hanging on to our relationship might not be in his best interest and they might start lessening our contact or "weaning us off each other.". I am heartbroken. I have never tried harder to make something work. I cannot imagine not having any idea if he is ok or not. Not being able to be a shoulder for him to cry on. I have never felt as hurt as I do right now. I dont know how to cope. Especially since my husband does not feel the same. I feel very alone.