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Hello,
In the last few years I met my biological father and I’ve met him twice in person, however, something doesn’t feel right.
He seems really keen to have me in his life, but I feel this may be due to him not having any strong family relationships already, and if I’m honest I don’t feel the same,
He sends me lots of messages and I stopped talking to him previously because I found it overwhelming but I wanted to give the situation another chance and I feel again overwhelmed and confused,
How do I tell him this without feeling bad? I tell myself I have a right to feel this way but struggle knowing how to put it to him!
Has anyone been in a similar situation?
Oh I think it is so important to tell him how you feel. Don't string him along. Just tell him that you think of him as a friend but not really a family member and that you're sorry but that's just the way it is because you weren't raised with him. If he's emotionally healthy, he will back off. If he doesn't, then you'll have to be firm and draw boundaries with him. I was so so excited to meet my birth family and my mother was not as excited. Everyone's different. I just thought of this is so great more family members! Yay! LOL. We all process differently, but definitely tell him. My bio mom didn't tell me but she told everyone else that she had no maternal feelings for me and that was really very rude of her. Had she told me, I would have backed off immediately. Give him that opportunity
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