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I adopted my grandson because my daughter his bio mom was on drugs, crazy behavior etc. the bio father is mentally unstable after drugs consumed, I’ve had home since he was 2 and he is now 13, he is an smart boy and quiet well behaved mostly, I read a lot of post and books about making sure the child knows the truth always which I have made sure of. I allow my daughter when she is behaving to visit doesn’t happen often maybe twice a year but I always feel her visits leave negative impact, I’m struggling with him lately because we moved 2 years ago because the bio father would randomly leave things on my doorstep, not good things for example a teddy bear with a hand drawn picture of a boy getting shot in the head and blood coming out with my grandsons name on it, so after that incident I moved out of state to protect him and me, but recently my grandson/son has become so rude and disrespectful towards me, purposely leaving late for school and if I tell him hurry he will be late he will lock himself in the bathroom, when I speak to him about something he doesn’t want to discuss he will snap at me and say I don’t care, mostly I ignore the bad teen attitude but I am lost and have no clue how to deal with it moving forward, when I tell him he’s hurting my feelings by speaking to me this way he again says he doesn’t care, I told him today that he is a priority to me and everything I do is to plan for his future etc and I don’t even feel like an option to him, he replied that I’m not an option, a few months back I got him into counseling but not sure it’s working, he doesn’t show emotion and that scares me but his therapist doesn’t see it as an issue. I told his therapist that for the last few weeks he stays in his room doesn’t want to even go outside and again she sides with him and says well he’s tired from school…..he’s 13 he has plenty of energy, I’m afraid something deeper that I can’t reach and don’t know how to navigate, but the therapist doesn’t seem to see it…..not sure what to do anymore, I sometimes feel I made a mistake by fighting so hard to adopt him. I hate to even think that way, I know kids can be cruel especially at this age but I just don’t know how to fix this. Before it gets worse :(
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