Gratitude and Adoption: It’s Tricky.

Gratitude, like love, isn't something you have to divide up into equal pieces. It's unlimited.

Misty Holbrook November 26, 2015
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I am very grateful for so many things. I am grateful for my house, for my husband, and for my cat. There is another thing I am also grateful for on this Thanksgiving. My family. Adoptive and birth.

A few times I have been told things like, “You should be grateful you have been placed with your mom.” or “Aren’t you glad you were adopted?” And yes, I am. My mom is the most amazing woman I have ever met. I will forever be grateful for the wonderful life she has provided for me. Just because I am so grateful to my mom, that doesn’t mean I have no gratitude towards my birth family and vice versa. I love having such a big happy family from both sides.

When you focus so much on one side of someone’s family, biological or adoptive,  I have found that sometimes it can offend either side. And that is something that I never want to do. I have noticed how many adoptees start conversations by saying how much they love their adoptive family before commenting about their birth families. It is almost like as adoptee we feel obligated to be more grateful to our adoptive parents than we are to our birth parents or family. It shouldn’t be this way. There shouldn’t be this divider, it should just be family.

Let me tell you, I am grateful for my family. There is no need to preface which family because to me, they are both my family. And I am grateful for my family. I am grateful that they will always be there to help me. They are always there to laugh with me, and show me love. I am grateful for a support system. People who are always there to cheer me on no matter what.

Adoption is great. I love the fact that I am an adoptee. Though, there is so much more to be grateful for than just adoption. Adoption is just a gateway to so many more things to be grateful for.  And those things will continue to bless my life forever.

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Misty Holbrook


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