Our journey took over eight years to have our family, but it was worth the wait for sure! My advice is to follow your gut instincts.
I became pregnant very easily. Unfortunately, even as a nurse, I had no idea a healthy pregnancy could go badly, so quickly. I developed severe preeclampsia at 23 weeks. I delivered my baby at 26 weeks, and we had him in this world for ten days before his tiny little body gave out.
After two years of failed attempts to get pregnant, we started down the fertility road. I hated it! I never felt infertility treatments would be the way we would start our family. I lost all control over my life and knew in my heart that those drugs were doing more harm than good.
We went through five rounds of IVF, and all the treatments that lead up to it, only to have one tubal pregnancy that left my tube damaged. That just cemented my feelings that this path was not for us.
After giving up on infertility treatments, we found out on Valentine’s Day that we were pregnant! It was a true miracle, but also something I knew would happen eventually!
With help from the high risk doctors, we delivered our healthy son, Andrew, who is now four-years-old.
Well, after two more years of failed attempts at pregnancy, we went to talk to another fertility doctor. I had a horrible feeling going into the appointment. This doctor actually had the nerve to lecture us on drinking during pregnancy— as if I had never been pregnant or had any knowledge of what that does to the baby. From that moment on, I knew without a doubt I would not go down that road ever again.
I kept having a feeling that we were meant to have another child in our family. My husband said he did not want to tempt fate since we already had our miracle son. Still, I could not shake the feeling for about six months. I looked into foster care, but that wasn’t for us. My husband flat out refused.
Then one day, we had several families over for a summer party. One of our guests began talking about a friend who needed to find a family to adopt her baby. My ears perked up. I asked if we could talk to her.
The mutual friend called her, and paved the way for us to meet the expecting mother. We had lunch together and discussed the possibilities. We had four months to get to know the expecting mother and her two girls. There were some rocky points, considering her history of drug abuse, but everything turned out beautifully.
Our son was born in January. I was the only one in the delivery room with the birth mom while our son was born. It was a very surreal event and time of our lives, to say the least.
We now have two miracles that have completed our lives in so many ways! I cannot say it enough to you; please follow your gut instincts! Without those feelings, and really listening to them, I may have never been in a position to be open to adoption.
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