Ways to Show Love in Adoption | Valentine’s Day

These 14 ideas will make this Valentine's Day your very best.

Denalee Chapman February 14, 2016
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Ah! Love! How wonderful that we have a day devoted to celebrating love. Helen Keller said, “The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” What is more beautiful than real love? On this day of celebration, let’s consider not just feeling love, but also showing it. Following are fourteen ways to show love in adoption:

1. Acknowledge your child’s birth mother with a special Valentine card. This is from you, not from the child. Include your real feelings:  What is it that you love about her? What would you tell her if this was the last time you could communicate with her? What adjectives describe your feelings for her?

2. Send flowers to your caseworker. Sure, it’s their job to make the adoption happen—but don’t you just love ‘em? Without your caseworker you might not have your child.

3. Tuck little notes inside a red balloon. Blow up the balloon, then stick a note to the outside saying “Pop Me.” These little notes of love for your adopted child will be a fun surprise after the loud *POP*!

4. Wrap a little gift for each year of the age of your child. Attach a photo of your child as a newborn to the first gift, a 1-year-old on the second gift, and so on. This makes a wonderful present for a birth mother.

5. Write a poem or letter, then read it aloud and post it on YouTube. Send the link to the recipient—your parents, child, birth mother, etc. Seeing your face and hearing your voice is as much a gift as the actual words.

6. How Do I Love Thee? “Count the ways” on a list you create for your mom or dad. As an added gift, frame the list . . . they’ll love it!

7. Mommy & Baby Gummy Bears: If you’re a birth mother, consider buying some large and small gummy bears, packaging them up in a clear bag tied with a bow. Attach a note of love and send to your child.

8. Candy heart phrases: Have your child choose the candy hearts with his/her favorite phrases. Use a piece of poster board to write a story for your child’s birth mother and have your child glue the hearts in the proper spots in place of written words.

9. Socks. Find some cute socks with hearts on them. Send them with a note of love to a member of the adoption triad who means something special to you.

10. Give flowers with a flair. If you live near enough to the birth mother of your child, hand-deliver fresh cut flowers in a vase you decoupage with photos of your child.

11. Make heart-shaped chocolates. Pick up a candy mold in the craft section of a store. Melt chocolate chips with just a spoonful of shortening or coconut oil in 30-second increments in the microwave. Pour into the molds. Stick the filled mold into the freezer then let your child pop out the chocolate hearts. This is a great gift for Mom, Dad, Birth Mother, or anyone!

12. Give laughter. Attach an envelope to a bag of nuts. Label the envelope: Nutty thoughts. Fill the envelope with funny things your child has said, or ask your child to make up jokes to fill the envelope with. Give the nutty gift to your child’s birth mother.

13. Send some kisses. Fill a small box with candy kisses. Put lipstick on your child and have him/her cover the outside of the gift box in kisses. Spraying the lipstick kisses with hairspray will help them to not smear. Give this gift to a birth parent or adoptive parent.

14.  Publicly thank your child’s parents. Upload a picture to a social media site of your child with his adoptive parents. Tag them in the photo and thank them for being his/her parents.

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Denalee Chapman

Denalee is an adoptive mother, a motivational speaker, a writer, and a lover of life. She and her husband have adventured through the hills and valleys of life to find that the highest highs and the lowest lows are equally fulfilling. Book Denalee to speak to your group, or find Denalee's writings, including her books on her website at DenaleeChapman.com.


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