A Conversation with Faith

A glimpse into the life of a single mom

Derek Williams October 17, 2018
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I got to know a 12-year-old youngster by the name of Faith about 10 years ago when she was a member of a church youth group I was leading. She was shy, quiet, kind, and thoughtful. She attended many other youth groups, but she was active and attended my youth group more than any other teen in the church. One of our group discussions was about abortion. There were many different views of abortion, but it was a very thought-provoking discussion.

Fast forward to a 19-year-old Faith. She found herself pregnant but not quite married yet. She gave birth to a beautiful baby boy named Jayden. She decided not to have an abortion but chose to give Jayden life, even though she and her boyfriend broke up and never got married. She decided to raise Jayden on her own—a very brave decision. She was a good mom. She got her own apartment, a car, and enrolled Jayden in a local day care, all while working full time.

I interviewed Faith in 2017, asking about her experience as a single mom. This is our conversation:

DW: What was your reaction when you found out that you were pregnant?

FAITH: Excited! I was excited to find out I would be a mother.

DW: Did you ever consider abortion?

FAITH: No. That’s not something I would ever consider.

DW: Why?

FAITH: Because I felt an instant connection. I knew my baby was alive, and I wanted the best for him. I knew I loved him the moment I found out.

DW: What challenges have you had as a single mom?

FAITH: I have a lot of support from my family, but I think the biggest challenge is working full time and finding a place for him to go during the day. Now he goes to daycare, but it was a struggle when he was a newborn.

DW:  Tell me about the joys of being the mom of a toddler.

FAITH: Watching him grow, watching him learn new words, and seeing his personality at such a young age.

DW: What advice would you give a 19-year-old girl facing an unplanned pregnancy who is considering abortion?

FAITH: A child is a blessing, and even though it may be hard or seems hopeless sometimes, don’t give up because being able to have a child is the best thing that ever happened to me, and being a mother is worth the struggle.

Faith died in a tragic car accident about eight months after that interview. Jayden survived the accident and is still recovering as of the writing of this article. Jayden is technically orphaned because his dad also died a few months earlier. However, Jayden is now being raised by his grandmother and a host of other family members, so he is surrounded by love and compassion.

We do not always know why things happen, but know this: the world is better because of Faith’s personal choice to have Jayden. If you are faced with an unplanned pregnancy, it may be scary. You may feel alone. But there are people willing to help you and your child. Do the right thing. Follow Faith’s example and give your child life.

Pregnant and considering adoption? You don’t need to do it alone. Click here to connect with a caring, compassionate adoption professional who can help you figure out what’s best for you and your baby. All consultations and counseling are absolutely free.  

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Derek Williams

Derek Williams is an adoption social worker and has been in the field of child welfare and behavioral health since 2006, where he has assisted families in their adoption journeys. He and his wife started their own adoption journey in 1993 and have 8 children, 6 of whom are adopted. His adopted children are all different ethnicities, including East Indian, Jamaican, and Native American. He loves traveling with his family and is an avid NY Mets fan! Foster care and adoption is a passion and calling for Derek and he is pleased to share his experiences with others who are like-minded.

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