Thanks to all of you for the info!!!!

Thank you so much for all of your posts! I am a single mother via donor insemination who is trying to evaluate whether to have a second child via DI or to adopt. In my heart, I believe adoption is the right way to go. Aside from the numerous health risks to me from a number of infertility problems and my age (40--I almost had a stroke when I was pregnant at 37), I feel that if I can give another child a home, it would be great to do so--for a child that otherwise might not have a home. However, much like Linny, because I am head of household, slightly above average income--but with a mortgage and education expenses to itemize, etc. I pay very little in taxes--maybe $3500 a year. I was thinking like many of you. I would adopt and then get cash back the following year. This cash would enable me to pay for my time off of work with a baby/child. I work for a small employer with no adoption benefit and wouldn't be eligible for short-term disability/maternity pay--even if I did give birth since my company doesn't offer one. Also, I would be going back to work after a few months and sending two children to high-quality daycare which in today's dollars would be $420 per week (for 2). I have no idea what it will cost by the time I adopt. So for me, it is about the money because it has to be. I need to feed and provide for my kids and not everyone is fortunate enough to be married, wealthy, with staying at home being an option. Note for stay-at-home advocates: I am not pleased with the result of kids staying at home with moms and being isolated in a household. From the few friends and family members that have done this, I count 3 sets of speech delayed children, 2 clinically depressed mothers, 1 mother with religious scrupulosity bordering on OCD, and a son who may have Auspergers syndrome with an older sister who is depressed at age 7. The mother with religious scrupulosity gave birth to a child at 27 weeks who was not gaining weight because of a 20-year old battle with bulemia. The child is obviously mentally challenged as a result. So don't bother being preachy and posting responses on how children do better at home with isolated mothers and little contact with other children. And for many adoptive married couples, they are stretching their dollars so that a mom or dad can opt to stay home--hopefully they will fair better than those I have known. Anyway, every penny will help to make that more possible. Nuts to you guys who aren't being supportive. I'm glad for those who have been honest and posted their frustrations. It's going to help me to plan in such a way so that I can better provide for a second child. And another child will have a home because of that.