October 6, 2017
I read an article earlier proposing a box for adoptees to check when they sign up for a membership or DNA test with Ancestry. The article upset me, but not for the reasons it upset other people. The aim of the box is to identify adoptees so that professional adoptee services can be recommended. First, I see that a marketing technique, which is not cool. Secondly, I should not have to differentiate myself from the rest of the population. Adoptees as a group are trying hard to earn the rights everyone else in the country has. We are trying to access records that should be ours to begin with, and now if we choose to search for our birth family, we need to be singled out to do so? Obviously no one can force you to check the box, but it's the whole idea of the thing. Adoptees already have to cross out pages of medical history requests at the doctor's office. We don't even get a box there. Isn't that bad enough? The idea I'd that some people (very few I'm sure) are getting 3rd or 4th cousin DNA matches. They don't know how to work through the results, so they just contact the first person on the list, tell them they are adopted, and ask for help. That is bad for many reasons. If you unintentionally reveal your parents' secrets to the whole family before reaching them, you could ruin any chance for a decent reunion. I recommend working through the matches based on public records and the information you have to find what you are looking for. Sometimes it takes time to work on or time until you get a better match. If you hit a wall and must contact someone, you always screenshot their family tree beforehand and never tell them you are adopted. In most cases if you say anything about adoption others will clam up and make their trees private. Here's the thing though, most adoptees who are using DNA have either heard that advice or get their results back with distant matches and don't try to go further because they don't know how. Quite honestly I feel like if you barge in like a crazy person and ruin your chance for a reunion then that is your own fault. We are all adults and have to take responsibility for our actions.

September 28, 2017
I have been following the laws surrounding original birth certificates. It makes me really happy that adoptees are learning their histories. I would love to have my original birth certificate. I can see both sides of the argument though. People assume if birth parents lose their anonymity then adoption rates will drop. They are probably right. As an adoptee, I think we have a right to know who and where we came from. I think we have a responsibility to respect our birth family's wishes if they don't want contact, but I think it's important to know our heritage and medical background. Being a birth mother must be incredibly difficult. I can't imagine what it would be like to build a life for yourself after placing a child for adoption only to have your past come back to haunt you. I look at my life with my birth mother in it, and I can't imagine my life without her in it. I wouldn't want to. People are protesting and writing to legislators trying to gain access to original birth certificates in their states. I support the cause, I do. I firmly believe we have a legal right to that document. I can't help but wonder though if any of it really matters. DNA testing is making huge strides in the search and reunion effort. I definitely feel like the people who are arguing to keep anonymity are fighting a losing battle. I wonder if they even realize that. The truth always comes out in the end. Not only were they never guaranteed secrecy, but eventually someone will use DNA to find them. We should be combating their need to stay hidden with DNA. Eventually all the states will be open, and I will just be glad that I was able to be a part of it. For my argument on adoptee rights: https://www.google.com/amp/adoption.com/never-stop-fighting-for-adoptee-rights/amp#ampshare=http://adoption.com/never-stop-fighting-for-adoptee-rights

September 21, 2017
I am a 28 year old soon to be birth mother who is wanting to connect with other birth mothers.... I am wanting to hear other stories from other birth moms and how they coped with giving theri child up!!!! Someone please contact me

September 19, 2017
I am searching for my biological father in Italy, Umberto Mignozzi - I am not sure of the correct spelling. It could be Mignossi, or Mignosi, or another derivative. I placed an advertisement in a prominent Venetian newspaper when I was about age 21-23 (Maybe in 1987). Shortly afterwards photographer came to my place of work and asked permission to take some photos of me. He took many. He said it was for a mural he was painting, but I knew my father had sent him because over lunch afterwards the conversation gently towards my father, but he did not admit it outright. In those days there were no cell phones or internet and I moved quite a few times since then, so if he had tried to reach me on my then land line phone number or address he would not have been able to have found me again. Once internet came I tried a few things but no luck since then. I am a white / Caucasian South African citizen of good upbringing and a professional makeup artist. I have been searching for my father on and off since I was 21, when I found out my late adopted father was not my biological father. I was searching for him again when I was recently (2014 - 2016) in Serbia, My address in Serbia was Vidrenjacka broj 1, 36320 Tutin, Serbia. I contacted the Tutin Red Cross at that time to try to find him. I heard nothing back from them. I do not have a photo of my father. I do not know if he is alive. I would love to meet him even just once. Even if he has passed away, I would somehow love to learn more information about him, even a photo would be enough. To meet his family would be wonderful. I would like to obtain my Italian citizenship if it is possible, because South Africa is a very dangerous and unsafe country to live in now and to find work here is not easy. I do not speak Italian, only English and Afrikaans. I can easily communicate with someone who speaks Dutch because Afrikaans is very similar to Dutch. I speak, read and write a small amount of Serbian, but very basic. My mother is still alive in Durban South Africa. She and my father communicated in German while she was in Venice, Italy, in 1965. I was born in 1966 in Durban, South Africa. The following information is what my mother gave me about my biological father, U.M. …. Umberto Mignosi /Minozzi , she is not sure of the spelling, born in Florence, Italy.From formerly Austrian district. Since1918 it was occupied by Italian troops. Trent 57m North of Verona. My father grew up in Tyrol /Tirolo /Tirol, Switzerland. Tirol is either in Austria or (so called sud-tirol) in Italy, in Trentino Alto Adige region. Umberto Mignosi worked and lived in Venice in 1965 when she met him and conceived me. Umberto said he was 28 in 1965 - born 1937 or a little before. This would make him approximately 80 now (2017). Umberto Mignosi was lodging with an elderly couple living in an alley near St Mark's Square, Venice, at that time when he met my mother, in 1965. My father communicated with my mother in German. My mother understood 'finance' so she guessed accounting was his profession. My mother said he worked as accountant for some government or municipal department then, perhaps post office. In 2015/16 an Italian acquaintance of mine in Italy said there is an Umberto Mignosi who worked in Veneto as judge at “Commissione tributaria” – tributary (fiscal) tribunal, who wrote a lot of books and articles in specialized tributary magazines, who then moved to Trento (so in the region where he was already) and continued his career, becoming a university professor. In 2015/16 I wrote an email to that university and they said they would forward my email. I heard no more from the university. In 2015/16 my Italian acquaintance looked for Umberto Mignosi who fits the profile of my father. He wrote the following to me …… “Mrs Teresa Mignosi ((https://www.facebook.com/people/Teresa-Mignosi/100007117337760) who could be approximately 40 to 50 years old, might possibly be his daughter? Her profile fits also. She was born in Venezia and moved to Trento, studied at University of Trento (where Mr. Umberto is/was a professor) and in 2015/16 was working at Provincia di Trento (a public administration). She does not use her Facebook. I sent her two messages to contact me but there was no reply. Her posts were fairly outdated on Facebook. On internet I found an Umberto Mignosi who lives in Trento (in Trentino / Alto Adige, the official name of the region); he wrote a book in 1990 on economics and he is a judge (and wrote an article on justice in 2012). Even if economics and jurisprudence aren't the same thing, I think he wrote both on economics and justice (it would be strange if there are 2 Umberto Mignosi in Trento, especially because Mignosi is a quite rare surname). There aren't biographic news on internet.” Please assist me in any possible way you can to help find and pass on all information about me to him. If my father is found please ask him to pass on his email address for me. I can use Google Translate or an Italian friend to translate an email for him. Or his phone number and I could call him if he speaks English or Dutch. If he cannot find me, please ask him to register on this website: The International Soundex Reunion Registry - http://www.isrr.net/ I am in the process of registering on the The International Soundex Reunion Registry website now which I only discovered today: This registering process will make me available to be found by my father if he registers on this website here: http://www.plumsite.com/isrr/ If there is some Italian or other international site or universal organisation where my father may have been able to register himself on in case he decided to search for me, in the hope that I might find his search for me there, where would I find that please? Is there a way to find out if my father may have contacted the registrar of adoptions in Italy or Pretoria (South Africa) or any such institution at any stage of my life? I have sent them an email. I am waiting for a reply. I have been trying to find him before it is too late. He is already elderly, maybe 80. If he is already passed away I would love to have a photo of him. He has a grandson of 27. My mother said my father was not very tall, had dark hair, was charming and make lots of jokes. So I am sure he will be the same with me. I cry when I think of meeting him. Tell him I love him because he is my other half. Yours sincerely

Annaleece Merrill
September 18, 2017
I have never been more nervous than the hour before I met my birth daughter's future adoptive parents. I remember walking up to them in the parking lot, feeling more scared than I ever had in my life. That fear lasted all of five minutes. I introduced my parents to them, and then they left us alone to talk. Over lunch, we discussed all kinds of things- likes/dislikes, how I'd been feeling, and about their son and the open adoption they have with his birth parents. I liked them very much. They were so down to earth, so funny and real. They were the kind of people I wanted to be in ten years. I loved them, and I could feel that they loved me- not just my baby. Afterwards we sat and talked with my parents. All was going well, until a seagull flew by and pooped on the hopeful adoptive father. He handled it with such grace and humor that I knew dirty diapers would be no problem for him. I can't really explain it, but that bird was how I knew. I didn't want to meet any more hopeful adoptive parents. They were her parents. Shortly thereafter I emailed them to let them know that they were going to be parents.

September 18, 2017
When I became the ‘birth mother’ I was dating a really cool guy. I had just graduated from high school and started college, and he was finishing high school. I found out I was pregnant pretty soon after we began having sex. We waited to tell our parents because I did not want to be forced to have an abortion after few months being pregnant my boyfriend passed away. For a young woman, finding out she's pregnant before she feels ready to be a mother can be terrifying and challenging. Perhaps one of the only things harder is deciding to place the baby for adoption , I have been looking for a family that will have a private adoption with me been searching a free-style, family or any single one willing to have his or her family through adoption . At the time I felt so lost and confused. I didn’t know what to do with my life, including the fact that a new life was coming. I grew up in poverty and knew that was not an option I was willing to consider for my child. At the time, I was planning on keeping my baby, but one day adoption came up in my mind . I sought out what it meant and what the expectations were. I was so scared and didn’t want to do it. After receiving advice from a church rev sister she informed me to search for an adoptive parent for my child on Facebook and after praying i decided to create a Facebook account to begin the journey . I am begging anyone who sees this post to share my story and post to help me locate a loving family for my child or any married couple or single person willing to adopt my Facebook account is new but i am willing to send you more pictures and information including where i live privately also i am willing to travel , and if you have been thinking about adoption contact me to know more information about me . My email address is mychildforeverparents@gmail.com .

September 18, 2017
Hi!! We are a married couple near Cincinnati, Ohio and looking to adopt a baby girl. We have 3 boys and 1 girl. I am unable to have anymore children. Please email me anytime to chat further!!! tonyatny3@gmail.com

September 15, 2017
I am an adoptee. I am completely supportive of adoption. Every person and every situation is different. I may not understand the reasons one decides to place a child for adoption, but I always support the decision. I could never place a child. I am selfish when it comes to my kids. I was not in a good position financially when I had either of them. I have never been able to give them all the things that they asked for or take them all the places they wanted to go. That aside, I have always felt I am the best person to raise them. I don't feel like anyone can love them, take care of them, or protect them the way I can because I am their mother. I recognize that is not always the case. I respect other people's choices not to parent. Despite my feelings as a mother I believe there is a tremendous amount of strength on adoption. The thought of taking a person who was physically attached to me for nine months and passing them to someone else is unbearable to me. In that position, that act would break me. It would end me. There would be no way to repair the shattered pieces of my former self. For those in open adoption, to see that child again and again would be like a knife stabbing me in the chest with every breath. I don't know where you find the strength, but I'm glad you do. For the parents who adopt, it must take great courage and confidence to raise a child who starts off as a stranger to you. I don't even like other people's children that much. I can't imagine moving one in and giving him or her the same love and affection as a biological child. Yet I know that you do because I was that child. It's not a charade or facade. It's real because I felt it. In recent years I have read too many stories of adoption wrapped in trauma and loss. What we need more of are tales of everyday people sporting invisible capes. I see you. No, adoptees should not be obligated to "give thanks" to their adoptive parents. They should feel thankful though. Adoption shouldn't be about sadness or emotional injuries. Adoption is about love and life and family.

September 12, 2017
Hi, on the 13th September 2016, My children were put into care by myself voluntary (section 20) I done this due to being in an abusive relationship, my husband physically and emotionally abused me and my children. I had to ensure they were safe so I made the call, now there adopted ! I couldn't get them back due to mental health issues, financial issues and housing. I honestly don't no how to cope it's really starting to eat me up recently I feel all alone and sad the majority of the time. Please if anyone is in this situation I need to talk to someone thanks for reading

Annaleece Merrill
September 11, 2017
I'm a birthmother, but I'm not irresponsible I'm a birthmother, but I'm not a dropout I'm a birthmother, but I'm not on drugs I'm a birthmother, but I don't 'get around' I'm a birthmother, but I'm not a bad mom I'm a birthmother, but I'm not crazy I'm a birthmother, but I didn't abandon my baby I'm a birthmother, but I'm not a surrogate I'm a birthmother, but I'm not lazy I'm a birthmother, but I'm not unstable I'm a birthmother, and I am intelligent I'm a birthmother, and I am a mom I'm a birthmother, and I love my birth child I'm a birthmother, and a good example I'm a birthmother, and I grieve daily I'm a birthmother, and I am proud I'm a birthmother, and I am human I'm a birthmother, and I am strong.