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Hi & Welcome, DH and I adopted our son Ryan through domestic parental placement (AKA private) adoption 18 months ago. DH was AD/USN at the time, just retired 31 May 03. First, I'd recommend reading anything you can get your hands on. Head to the library! There are three primary ways of becoming parents through adoption: 1. International 2. Domestic Parental Placement 3. Waiting Child/Foster Care Each carries its' own benefits and risks. There is no one 'right' or 'best' way, it's what's best for you. I'd ask yourselves questions like these: 1. How important is it that your child share your ethnic heritage? 2. How important is it that you parent a newborn? 3. How much are you comfortable spending in fees? 4. How comfortable do you feel raising a child who may have been exposed to abuse, neglect or post-institutionalization issues (these may or may not be known at placement)? 5. How willing/able are you to travel, planned or on short notice? 6. How comfortable are you sharing your interests, beliefs, values, lifestyle with others? Most base legal cannot assist in adoption, but it's worth a check. The military offers a $2000 fee reimbursement once your adoption is final. Other than that, I'd encourage DH to share your plans with his Command when you've decided how you'll pursue, so that they're aware of his travel and/or leave needs. My DH's command was very supportive of him, allowing him to leave with literally 1 hour notice so we could be there when Ryan was born. HTH, please feel free to ask questions.

Hi there, I apologize for taking so long to respond, but I've been on a few business trips. I particularly wanted to chime in because as a military couple, my husband and I were in your shoes at one point in time- new to the idea of adoption etc. We are not infertile or at least we don't think we are. :) We just felt adoption was right for us. So, we started investigating and felt international adoption was the way to go. We researched thoroughly agencies and countries. I can't say enough about being VERY CAREFUL about researching your agency. We also examined countries in nauseum. We thought we were interested in Eastern European countries, and went down that route. After a referral visit trip to Bulgaria, I came home convinced Eastern Europe was not for us. My personal experience led me to believe that there were higher incidences of attachment issues, fetal alcohol syndrome etc. So we started looking at other countries- primarily Latin America. Latin American countries seem to have a better reputation for overall health of the children. We are now adopting from Panama and couldn't be happier. Of course we are still waiting for a referral and so this could change. Being a military couple has not posed many problems for us at all. That's not to say that there haven't been things that have required extra work on our part. My husband has been deployed to the middle east for 11 months, so it has required us to be more organized in regards to paperwork etc. It was kind of challenging to get an employment verification letter for him, with salary etc. It has also been interesting working with military medical facilities to get his physical etc. They are not receptive to performing additional tests etc. on soldiers. Thankfully, I am covered on my own health insurance through work and it helps speed things along. Our social worker who conducted our homestudy couldn't have cared less about us being a military family. In fact, I think it helped. She seemed to like the idea of our children growing up surrounded by the diversity inherent within the military. She also thought it was good that we could be stationed overseas again, and our children would experience other cultures. We are set to PCS in February and that hasn't even concerned our adoption agency. They didn't even care! So all in all, being a military family has actually helped more than hurt us. I'd be happy to answer any questions you may have either posted here or via private message. Good Luck!!! Kirsten

Hello, We just started our adoption journey in September, so it's still very new to me as well. We are hoping for a domestic infant adoption. We are going thru a local children's services and our paperwork is done. We are just waiting to be placed. I don't think that being military is a deterent--like the above poster said, it's probably a good thing because of the diversity. Hey, I'm a military brat and a military wife--it was a good upbringing for me :0) The only way I could think that it would not be a good situation is if you had an open adoption with lots of visitation....could get hairy when you PCS. We are doing semi open with all contact thru the agency only. AS far as legal help, our base is willing to look over the adoption paperwork before it is finalized, but will not represent us or file the paperwork. We will need to hire a civilain attorney for that. We are also eligible for a $2k military adoption tax credit towards adoption fees, as well as the $10k tax credit. I think the military $2k credit is a one time use thing, but I am not sure about that. Anyone else know? We didn't have alot of resistance with getting dh's physical done simply because I no longer allow Try-to-care and the base doctors to push me around; they jerked me around one too many times and I refuse to let it happen again. Fortunately, dh had had alot of the bloodwork already done because of infertility work up. He is currently deployed and we had a special POA drawn up so that I can sign if we are placed before he gets home. Our agency gave us a list of specifc paperwork that would have to be signed when we are placed and that was the list we used to get the specific POA. Even though we are both ready to be parents, I hope that dh is home when our forever child comes home to us! Best of luck to you! If you have anymore questions, just ask! The ladies here have been so helpful!

Hi my husband and I are adopting from the state of California. There is no cost involved with state adoption or atleast I know California and Hawaii. We have been very pleased with the process here in California. It has been very easy and our SW is a very nice guy. We had to take some classes and that we enjoyed. We are waiting for licensing to come out and licensing our home that should be sometime this month after that its just the wait for the placement. I encourage people to look into the sate adoptions. Also the more open you are the faster your process will go. Another thing we have a command who is behind us so it helps so that can let you go when you need to go. Its also good to begin the process as soon as arrive at your duty station or put in for extension you have to have atleast one year stabilization. We encourage others to try the state. All you do is call the department of social services and attend orientation. Then you attend classes. I wish ou the best and hope you call the state to check out what they have to offer. Also the military does give Finacial assistance up to 3,000.00 I believe. Good Luck...