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Hi. I'm Ted, an Air Force Captain down here in sunny Florida. I'm single, never married, and the proud parent of a 15 year old kid named Mike. Mike was 8 when I first met him in Colorado in 1997 and, in fact, the more I think of it, I actually adopted him in March 1998. His father was gone before he was born; his mother was an alcoholic and substance auser. Not to mention a physical child abuser. Mike had been through 2 failed placements, one with family, the other not. Had lots of the problems that you read about with older children available for adoption, including reactive attachment disorder.
Over six years later, Mike is a totally normal kid in 9th grade, pulling all the normal stunts that teenage boys do. He informed me the other day that I was welcome to take him to his Halloween party, provide him with a bit of $$, and then take off (show up again at midnight, please).
Getting to this point was a lot of fun and also a labor of love. When I adopted him from the state of Colorado, this was a completely closed adoption. He wanted to see his cousin Dougie (now 16) so I decided to try the open route. Turned out great. Mom had so many issues that the extended family was willing to make sure she didn't have access to Mike in order for them to be able to visit. She got regular updates as I now know. She died last Christmas, and everything came out in her diary which her family let me see.
For those of you wanting to adopt, and I speak especially to single parents, there are so many challenges ahead of you. Let me tell you that the adoption process was the easiest of those challenges for me. If anybody wants some advice or help, please let me know. I would love to share and help you realize your dream as well.
Ted
Thanks for posting. I am a single man currently looking for a placement through the domestic route. I have not found many single men that share my desire or commitment to adopt. Right now, I scan through photolistings and meet with the scoial woker every few weeks. I have had a couple of offers, but for children that were beyond my capability. Any words of advice would be greatly appreciated during this time.
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