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Hi ~
As parents, we enjoy our role and our children more when they are well behaved. Raising children is more pleasurable when children cooperate with us and their siblings rather than behaving defiantly. So it is no surprise that good behavior is a high priority for us.
But how do we define good behavior? There is no one 'correct' way to raise children. There is no agreed upon set of 'commandments' about how children should act. Often two partners do not agree on standards and expectations. We might disagree on what is a good bedtime, what are acceptable snacks or how many activities the kids should be involved in. Though children learn to accomodate different rules and standards of parents, it is preferable to have some consistency so children are not confused about what is expected of them.
Children also benefit from getting along with people outside of the family - at school, on teams and in society.
What behaviors are valued in your household?
Do you and your partner agree? If not what are some of the rules that you disagree about?
What strategies do you use to encourage those behaviors that you want to continue?
Nancy
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These topics are always so interesting...thanks! I don't want to go on about my child raising theories...that could last all day, lol. I do want to add that behavior, or rather, "good" behavior is sometimes VERY hard to reconcile with strong self esteem. It took me several years to understand that. One of the most important things to me is that my kids are confident enough to stand up for themselves. I was raised never to defy authority. That sometimes led to accepting the unacceptable. So "polite" kids also have to be assertive kids. It is a difficult line to draw. Somehow we have succeeded with my kids, I can't say exactly how. Mostly by talking and being really open. But also by supporting them and their feelings. That makes me believe I have "good" kids! (hubby agrees with that one) Love, Debi
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Hi Debi~
I'm so happy you find the topics interesting! Thanks.
I couldn't agree more with your post and the importance of self-esteem and independent thinking for kids. We want to help them to be self sufficient and to make wise decisions as well as encouraging 'good' behavior - it's a delicate balance and I can't say enough about the importance of good communication.
Thanks for you post.
Nancy
This is a very interesting topic regarding the behavior. Maximum of the children watches to get clues on how to behave in the world. If you want to guide your child in a good behavior you have to be the role model for your child. As he spend the maximum of time at home itself so he closely watches the people at home and their behavior. What you do is more important than what you speak, If you need your child to talk in a pleasing manner first you need to say it yourself. Parents has to speak quietly and gently so that your child will not raise the voice. If when ever your child behaves well you need to give them a positive feedback about their behavior.